The Importance Of Sharing The Same Faith As Your Spouse

The Importance Of Sharing The Same Faith As Your Spouse

Sharing the same faith makes things easier.
Tiffany R
Tiffany R Sep 5, 2016
390
views

Webster defines faith as a strong belief or trust in someone or something. There are a million different things to put your faith in. Your neighbor, your education, your spouse, science, other people – the list goes on. I put my faith in God and so does my husband. That might seem like a no brainer, but in reality, having something to put your faith in is so important for many different reasons. I believe that putting your faith into something gives you a solid ground to stand on.

While I do believe that having faith in something is extremely important for personal growth, I also believe that it is important to share the same faith as your spouse. That isn’t the say that two different people with two different faiths can’t have a successful life together because they can. I just think that that sharing the same faith as your spouse can help other things move along.

One reason why I think it’s important is because it affects how you work through things. When you hit a wall and have no idea what your next move is, if your spouse has the same faith as you, you’ll work through the problem easier. When my husband and I hit a problem in our lives, we take time to think about the different solutions, we pray about it and we come up with the best plan to solve the problem. It works for us because we have the same faith. If we had different faiths, it would probably take twice as long to come to an agreement on something because we would have different morals and reasonings.

Not only is sharing the same faith as your spouse important for working through your marital issues, but it’s also import when it comes to raising your kids. Kids are the most impressionable people you’re ever going to meet. If your faith is important to you and your spouse, then you should make it important for your kids as well. If you have the same faith as your partner, then some of the difficult stuff with kids aren’t going to seem so difficult. Everything from punishments and rewards to life goals and plans are going to fall in line with what you and your spouse have faith in. That helps setting your kids up for success knowing that you’re all on the same page. Sharing your faith with your kids should also help create a trusting bond so they’ll always be able to come to you for anything.

Someday, your kids aren’t going to be kids anymore. They’re eventually going to grow up, leave the house and be productive members of society. If your faith is important to you and you show them that, then your kids will go off into the world sharing their faith with other people. Some kids will expand out beyond your faith and figure out their own faith, and there is nothing wrong with that. They also might share your faith, but also find someone who has a different faith, and that’s okay too! As a parent you’d like to think that you can make every decision for your child, but as long as you share your faith with them, then there really shouldn’t be a problem…right?

When all else fails and there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel, it’s important to fall back on your faith. If your faith falls on science, then you know the most logical answer to everything. If your faith falls back on education, then you know that you can find the answer somewhere. If your faith falls on your spouse, then you literally have to rely on your spouse to figure everything out. My faith falls on God and I share that common faith with my husband. We fall back on him every time we have issues. We pray about a lot of things. We have faith that God will help us figure our way out of things. Sharing the same faith has made everything else seem so small.

Cover Image Credit: Flickr
Tiffany R
Tiffany R Sep 5, 2016
At Murfreesboro, Tennessee

Popular Right Now

It's Time To Thank Your First Roommate

Not the horror story kind of roommate, but the one that was truly awesome.
Katie Ward
Katie Ward Feb 1, 2016
879364
views

Nostalgic feelings have recently caused me to reflect back on my freshman year of college. No other year of my life has been filled with more ups and downs, and highs and lows, than freshman year. Throughout all of the madness, one factor remained constant: my roommate. It is time to thank her for everything. These are only a few of the many reasons to do so, and this goes for roommates everywhere.

You have been through all the college "firsts" together.

If you think about it, your roommate was there through all of your first college experiences. The first day of orientation, wishing you luck on the first days of classes, the first night out, etc. That is something that can never be changed. You will always look back and think, "I remember my first day of college with ____."

You were even each other's first real college friend.

You were even each other's first real college friend.

Months before move-in day, you were already planning out what freshman year would be like. Whether you previously knew each other, met on Facebook, or arranged to meet in person before making any decisions, you made your first real college friend during that process.

SEE ALSO: 18 Signs You're A Little Too Comfortable With Your Best Friends

The transition from high school to college is not easy, but somehow you made it out on the other side.

It is no secret that transitioning from high school to college is difficult. No matter how excited you were to get away from home, reality hit at some point. Although some people are better at adjusting than others, at the times when you were not, your roommate was there to listen. You helped each other out, and made it through together.

Late night talks were never more real.

Remember the first week when we stayed up talking until 2:00 a.m. every night? Late night talks will never be more real than they were freshman year. There was so much to plan for, figure out, and hope for. Your roommate talked, listened, laughed, and cried right there with you until one of you stopped responding because sleep took over.

You saw each other at your absolute lowest.

It was difficult being away from home. It hurt watching relationships end and losing touch with your hometown friends. It was stressful trying to get in the swing of college level classes. Despite all of the above, your roommate saw, listened, and strengthened you.

...but you also saw each other during your highest highs.

After seeing each other during the lows, seeing each other during the highs was such a great feeling. Getting involved on campus, making new friends, and succeeding in classes are only a few of the many ways you have watched each other grow.

There was so much time to bond before the stresses of college would later take over.

Freshman year was not "easy," but looking back on it, it was more manageable than you thought at the time. College only gets busier the more the years go on, which means less free time. Freshman year you went to lunch, dinner, the gym, class, events, and everything else possible together. You had the chance to be each other's go-to before it got tough.

No matter what, you always bounced back to being inseparable.

Phases of not talking or seeing each other because of business and stress would come and go. Even though you physically grew apart, you did not grow apart as friends. When one of you was in a funk, as soon as it was over, you bounced right back. You and your freshman roommate were inseparable.

The "remember that one time, freshman year..." stories never end.

Looking back on freshman year together is one of my favorite times. There are so many stories you have made, which at the time seemed so small, that bring the biggest laughs today. You will always have those stories to share together.

SEE ALSO: 15 Things You Say To Your Roommates Before Going Out

The unspoken rule that no matter how far apart you grow, you are always there for each other.

It is sad to look back and realize everything that has changed since your freshman year days. You started college with a clean slate, and all you really had was each other. Even though you went separate ways, there is an unspoken rule that you are still always there for each other.

Your old dorm room is now filled with two freshmen trying to make it through their first year. They will never know all the memories that you made in that room, and how it used to be your home. You can only hope that they will have the relationship you had together to reflect on in the years to come.


Cover Image Credit: Katie Ward
Katie Ward
Katie Ward Feb 1, 2016
At Duquesne University

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

We Need To Start Talking About Marital Rape — It Exists & It's Not OK

Marital rape exists, and it is a crime (for the most part) and morally wrong.

Allison Keating
Allison Keating Mar 22, 2019
313
views

Trigger warning: This article discusses sexual assault and may be triggering for some readers.

Some people believe that rape is not possible in a marriage. They believe ideas such as when you marry, you give your body to your spouse, and they have an entitlement to it. Some people still carry the historical concept of coverture, that a woman is her husband's property upon marriage, or believe that a couple is a union upon marriage and because one cannot rape itself, you have come together as one.

None of the previously mentioned situations are what a marriage should be. Marriage should be the legal recognition of a dedicated, long-term, committed relationship between two people that involves trust, respect, care, communication, and effort. Upon marriage, each individual is still their own person that possesses bodily autonomy and is required to give and expected to receive respect. There is no such thing as owing sex, giving your body away, or being property. If you are marrying someone and expecting possession or say over their body, that is not marriage. That is controlling, abusive and, potentially, violent.

While marital rape was made illegal in the U.S. in 1986 (let's also note 1986—that was very recent), 13 states have appalling loopholes that treat marital rape differently than rape between unmarried people. Some states do not have one code of laws for all rape, but two separate codes of law for rape and marital rape, and the requirements to qualify as marital rape are much less extensive than the requirements are to qualify as rape for unmarried people. Some states only classify marital rape as involving force or threat of force, excluding situations such as mental illness, mental or physical disability, intoxication, no consent, or unconsciousness.

Let's look at some specific states. Marital rape is barely illegal in Ohio, where anything outside of "force or threat of force" is only illegal if the spouses are not living together. Ohio allows the drugging of a spouse, sex with them while asleep, unconscious, or any other instances where consent cannot be given. Sex with minors is also not covered, as the age to marry in Ohio is 16, with no minimum if the female is pregnant. The introduction of House Bill 97 attempted to revise the law to make all rape illegal in Ohio in 2017, but it failed to receive Republican support.

In South Carolina, for example, marital rape's punishment is less than unmarried rape. It is only punishable for up to ten years, while rape between unmarried people is punishable for up to 30 years.

In Connecticut, marital rape is defined as only involving force or threat of force, while unmarried rape involves a whole list of offenses such as the victim is physically helpless, drugged, or mentally incapacitated. Connecticut also omits sex with minors, which spouses are exempt from, and Connecticut has no minimum age to marry with parental and judicial consent.

In Idaho, women cannot rape. Only men can legally be convicted of rape. Rape has ten circumstances in Idaho's statutes, however, only four legally count as rape when it's between married people. When it's between married people, Idaho excludes if the victim was unconscious, sleeping, temporarily and permanently has a mental disability or illness, asleep, thought the perpetrator was someone else due to purposeful misleading from the perpetrator, or the victim is a minor. Idaho has no minimum age to marry with parental and judicial consent, and the proposed bill to set that age at 16 with the court and parental permission failed in the Idaho State House in February of 2019.

In Michigan, a "person may not be charged or convicted solely because his or her legal spouse is under the age of 16, mentally incapable, or mentally incapacitated." Michigan also has no legal minimum age for marriage with parental and judicial consent.

Spouses in both Michigan and Idaho are exempt from the legal age of consent. This legally allows adults to have sex with children, like a 48-year-old man who married a 15-year-old bride in Michigan.

We need more dialogue in this nation about the legislation for sexual assault in spousal relationships. Marriage should not be a loss of autonomy nor legal protection. Marriage should be a happy, safe relationship for all that has legal protection for all.

Allison Keating
Allison Keating Mar 22, 2019
At University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign

Related Content

Facebook Comments