Girls are petty. They are competitive: socially, academically, and athletically. I know this, and I strive every day to not be one of those that builds myself up by tearing others down, whether it be to their knowledge or not. I have seen and been friends with silent bullies who tear someone down will a simple sneer. While it is way more popular in middle and high school, it is almost impossible to completely eliminate the mean girl ways.
I am luckily reminded in college how less common mean girl syndrome is. Some of the nicest girls, who eventually sometimes become friends, are those who come off as being "judgey" or standoffish. You just have to learn to defer judgement and learn the importance of girl support.
Sure, every girl knows the basics. If you see a girl alone at a party, you check on her. If a girl is alone in any situation, you ask if she's okay. When a girl looks uncomfortable by a guy, you step in. Those are just plain common sense rules. What isn't as clear is the importance of female support, regardless of a sketchy situation.
It is easy to be there for a fellow girl stranger when she seems in a pickle. It isn't so easy to support her when she has something you want or something you can't have. That's when the almighty pettiness that us girls tote around comes into play. But that is also when it becomes the most important. Over and over again it is said that the minute we treat each other poorly is the minute we give guys the same power.
Why do we think it's okay to call another girl a slut, but when a guy does it he deserves to be castrated and black balled? We get mad at double standards, so why do we continue to put them in place? It is never okay to simply look at another girl and assume you know all there is to know about her simply because of the way she dresses ora acts at parties. You wouldn't want her doing the same to you, so don't make that snap judgement.
It isn't that hard to live your own life worrying about your own actions and only step in when others' become dangerous and/or suspicious. Let that girl from your floor sleep with all of a fraternity and just be there when one of them breaks her heart. Warn your friend about the dangers of binge drinking but hold her hair back when she learns the lesson herself.
Too many times friendships are broken due to misunderstandings and self righteousness. Don't be the girl who loses friends, both potential and withstanding, by being a judging, insecure mess. You never know the story behind the person.
