I preface the following declaration with a strong knock on a wooden surface.
I've been blessed to have mostly positive emotional interactions and experiences in my life. Family, friends, colleagues and acquaintances have generally been nothing short of wonderful in their interactions with me unless I was having a bad hair day, and for that I couldn't be more thankful.
That being said, this greatest blessing has been my most horrid curse. Practice makes perfect, and the amount of practice I've had with negative emotional interactions and experiences has been less than sufficient. Now, at 22 years old, I feel like life is about to plunge me headfirst into a cesspool of difficult decisions of all sorts. These decisions will involve toxic relationships, dead-end jobs and perspectives on life, all of which will make a big contribution to how the rest of my life is going to be.
Choosing the right subject to pursue in college, removing people from my life who cause more harm than good and knowing when to walk from a job will all form a rite of passage that I'll think of fondly yet perhaps never wish to relive.
How does one tackle such an onerous undertaking? Through immunity. A state of emotional being where numbness reigns supreme and decisions can be made in nearly completely logical manner. How does one achieve immunity? Through emotional strength.
Despite the blessings I've received, I too have had my share of moments where I had to face fears I would've rather not. An old love in the arms of another lover, a former partner in crime succumbing to the evils of crime and general waywardness, and more. Many advised me to stay far away from these people and situations so as to let my heart heal. But while some time away is good initially, the recipe for growth involves facing these evils dead on.
If you can face these monsters you find so ghoulish and come out winning—which you will, because what doesn't kill you makes you stronger—you'll become immune to their influence and a much stronger human being as a result.
The best part of it all is that everyone has fears like this, so you're not alone. Go ahead. Face them, and brace yourself for the gladiator you shall become.
