I know it's been awhile since we've talked, and I know my appearance within your lives has been so inconsistent, but I need you all to know that there's reasoning behind all of this. I know you are all so young and you can't completely understand what is going on, but I hope one day I can explain everything. I think about you guys every single day, and I hate that I am missing out on such big leaps within your lives, it kills me every day that passes. I want you all to know that there will be a time when we will all come back together again and pick up where we left off. This is one of the biggest decisions I've ever had to make, as you guys are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I've spent most of my life trying to please everyone, and sticking around in situations that broke me, just so I could keep the little things that make me the happiest. When I say the littlest things, I mean you guys. Sometimes life throws you into situations where you have to choose between holding on for the sake of others or letting go for yourself. I've always held on because I knew that if I were to let go, I would be risking my relationship with all of you. Although you guys made me so happy, certain situations in which I decided to hang onto just continued to break me down. As I mentioned earlier, sometimes life will throw you into situations where you almost become at battle with your own self. I always think about this situation as a rubber band. You can only hold on for so long until you get tired, and the longer you hold on, the more it hurts to let go. I think of that rubber band as you guys. I held on for so long because I didn't want to risk my relationship with you guys, but then I think of our father as the pressure of the rubber band continuing to hurt me. Fortunately in this situation, you guys and our father stood on the same side of the spectrum, so choosing to let go, meant letting go of you guys as well. One day I got tired of holding on, and as much as it hurt me, I let go for myself. You guys will learn that sometimes happiness comes when you finally let go. Although I let go of that rubber band, I will never let go of what we have, and what we can still have in the future. I'm sorry that our relationship has to consist of facetime calls, and "I miss you texts," but I can't apologize for letting go of something that continued to hurt me, and I pray to god that you guys can one day understand. I love you guys with every single inch of my being, and I can't wait until we can reunite again one day and pick up where we left off.

Love always,

Your big sister