I just finished college and I am definitely lost. I was contemplating graduate school, but that is not the route I want to be on so soon. What I am certain of is a future in media and that I am, by definition, a writer.

I think one of the amazing things of having put myself through the torture of college, especially a double major, is having exposed myself to so much material. But now what? I set out to be a television writer and discovered that I am in fact a poet. I was in a poetry class and had avoided that class all together. Before signing up for classes as a creative writing major, I had already decided that poetry would not be something I did for a year, I gave it a semester at most.

When I finally received my syllabus, I thought the class would be a nuisance. We had weekly assignments and art projects, all which were rushed because I still had not valued that form of expression. I was so used to writing plays, scripts etc., I thought I could just breeze through poetry like it never happened. Don’t get me wrong, I have always been obsessed with poetry, whether it is reading it, listening/watching poetry being performed or through music. But I was set on the idea that I could not write it and it was too late to fall in love with a different form of writing because I had already worked so hard in developing my skills in a different way.

Somewhere, halfway through the semester, possibly longer, I fell in love with writing poems. I made fun of my professor’s overreactions to the poetry countless times but then it finally got me. When I heard my classmates perform the last few days of the semester, I knew something was stirring up in my mind. I put together a mock prince funeral and it was my favorite thing to do all year, probably all of college.

It was a true combination of my love for visuals through a video I created and language through the poem I performed. I saw both of my majors being put to good use in one performance. Although it may not have been the best delivery imaginable, it was a unique feeling to assemble everything. I felt like I was finally being creative in a way that I enjoyed. Then poetry became a habit.

I would write every day. I still do. I have felt that for the first time in my life, I am doing what a writer is supposed to do, and the one thing we are told is to just write and make it a serious habit. So I did just that through poetry. I think my poetry skills have grown so much, even more than when I was in the class because now I give myself the time needed for each and every word and line. I believe that has really been the point of the class, maybe college in general.

But then again, now what? I truly believe that any skill is transferable into something practical, especially writing. My friend put cutting limes as a skill on her resume so sure, all things are possible. One thing that I wanted to accomplish by the end of college was to make writing a habit serious enough that I have to do it for a living. I guess I’ll find out what becomes of me later on. A part of what I’m really trying to say is that I spent a lot of time being set on one thing because I was scared that I would change my mind.

The reason why that has been so scary is because I guess not knowing is worse than doing anything at all in my anxious mind. I’ll probably end up being a television writer and I might put my love for poetry to good use as well. It is ok to be versatile in that way. But right now in my life I don’t know what direction to take. Knowing that I have developed my skills in such a way that makes it possible to market myself as a writer at all makes me excited for the future.