I'm Fake In Love With You
Start writing a post
Relationships

I'm Fake In Love With You

You'll become one of my should haves.

19
I'm Fake In Love With You

I yearn for what I can’t inquire. I picture your hands being gentle, your voice being raspy but sincere at 3 in the morning, your steps being easy to stride behind. But I watch from a distance. It is easier to picture things than replay them. I watch your Facebook posts where your democratic pride shows through. There’s an entire online world our society has created. I can get to know you without chancing actual heartbreak. You told me once maybe I just haven’t met the right guy. You’re right, I obviously haven’t. Except my hands are still tied by phantom limbs from the last not “right guy”. You could be the right guy but when I try to speak I choke on possibilities I can’t risk becoming realities. I don’t see love the way you do. If I did I could walk into class and do more than just smile at you from across the room. I could jokingly flirt with you the way you do with me when I can actually mutter up the words to speak to you. I don’t see crushes the way you do. I see the future past your scruff, tattoos, and sense of humor. I see the inevitable ending. I’ve programmed myself to shut it down before it even starts. The cliché reason is it keeps me from getting hurt. I’m not worried about me getting hurt though. I have a tough soul. I’m worried about what you would have to go through. You seem like the type to take on a challenge however this isn’t a hard math problem or fixing a machine at work or even rerouteing your way to school around an accident. There would be long nights, fights I can’t explain, unnecessary and excessive sorrys. No one wants to be the one that comes after the worst. I would rather hold onto being fake in love with you. I would rather day dream and build up a fantasy because as A Cinderella Story says “sometimes fantasy is better than reality.” In a few weeks the chance of my fantasy love becoming a reality love ends. I’m not unnerved by that. I’m actually relieved. As of now, there are opportunities for me to muck up those twenty seconds of courage We Bought a Zoo tells me is the only thing I need. When those weeks end, you become one of my should’ves. I can hold onto what Andy Warhol said best… “Fantasy love is much better than reality love. Never doing it is very exciting. The most exciting attraction is between two opposites that never meet.” Cheers to all the things we’ll never do together, to all the insides jokes our stomachs never hurt from laughing at, to all the pointless spontaneous road trips ending in crappy motels and waffle house meals. Thank you for letting me be fake in love with you. I’ll probably forget you in time but for the moment, for right now my fantasy of you is exactly what I’ve needed.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

38496
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

22796
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

949311
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

126364
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments