If The Characters From 'The Office' Were In Your Sorority

If The Characters From 'The Office' Were In Your Sorority

The only thing more exciting than Pretzel Day
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Hands down 'The Office' is the funniest television show that I have ever seen. I’ve actually watched the series in its entirety about four times. After watching it over and over again, I’ve become kind of an expert on the show and feel as if I know the characters on a personal level. So personal in fact, that I actually thought about how each of the characters would fit into my life, more specifically my sorority life.


1. Kelly Kapoor

Kelly would be the sister that knows everything about everyone. Your boyfriend just broke up with you? Yeah, Kelly would know about it the week before it actually happened. Kaitlyn and Shannon aren’t talking to each other? Kelly would know when and why it happened probably before either one of them even knew what was going on. Although you would want to hate her, you would keep her around just so you could always be in the know.


2. Toby Flenderson

Toby would be that senior who's been in the sorority all four years of his college career. He would be the one constantly reminding everyone about how the sorority was run back when he first joined and how it was “so much better” than the way it is now. I can almost guarantee that he would hold the risk management position for his chapter. Although everyone would be secretly counting down the days until he graduates, the chapter would miss his mothering presence. He would be the sister to call if you needed someone responsible and sober to drive you home or to just help navigate you throughout college.


3. Meredith Palmer

Need moves? Meredith would be the sister to hit up if you wanted to know which fraternity was having a party or which nightclub was serving the best drinks. Her inappropriate (yet funny) remarks would help make chapter meetings not so boring and her confidence would help inspire others to become more comfortable in their own skin. Bonus: the Executive Board would be so focused on taming Meredith that you would be able to get away with practically anything.


4. Dwight K. Schrute

If Dwight joined a sorority, he would be a contributing reason as to why people think sororities are cults. He would be the member that spent his whole life dreaming about being in a sorority and when it came time for him to accept a bid, he’d let it go to his head. He would know absolutely everything there is to know (and probably more than any member would ever want to know) about his organization and often brag about it to others. All of Dwight’s belongings would somehow be affiliated with his sorority and he would never shut up about how much he loves being involved in Greek life.


5. Michael Scott

Michael Scott would be the ideal sorority girl! He would be the sister that joined for all the right reasons. His loving presence would help unite the sorority together and help strengthen the overall sisterhood. He would be the shoulder to lean on in tough times and the one holding your hair back after celebrating the good times.


Unfortunately, these characters aren’t real and if they were real, I don’t know if they would necessarily leave Dunder Mifflin to join a sorority. However, a girl can dream, can’t she?!

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37 Drake Lyrics From 'Scorpion' That Will Make Your Next Instagram Caption Go Double Platinum

Side A makes you want to be single, Side B make you want to be boo'd up.

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We all knew Scorpion was going to be the summer banger we wanted. However, Drake surprised us with two sides of an album and two sides of himself. Mixing rap and R&B; was genius on his part, so why not dedicate 37 of his lyrics to our Instagram captions?

1. "Don't tell me how knew it would be like this all along" — Emotionless

Definitely a "I'm too good" for you vibe.

2. "My mentions are jokes, but they never give me the facts" — Talk Up

This one's for my haters.

3. "I wanna thank God for workin' way harder than Satan" — Elevate

For when you're feeling blessed.

4. "I promise if I'm not dead then I'm dedicated" — March 14

In Drake's story about his son the world knows about now, we get a lyric of true love and dedication

5. "My Mount Rushmore is me with four different expressions" — Survival

6. "Pinky ring 'til I get a wedding ring" — Nonstop

7. "I gotta breathe in real deep when I catch an attitude" — 8 Out of 10

This first line of the song is about to be spread on the gram like a wildfire

8. "Heard all of the talkin', now it's quiet, now it's shush" — Mob Ties

9. "California girls sweeter than pieces of candy" — Sandra's Rose

This is gonna have every girl who has ever stayed in Cali all hot and heavy, watch it.

10. "I think you're changing your mind, starting to see it in your eyes" — Summer Games

Y'all know how these summer games go

11. "Look the new me is really still the real me" — In My Feelings

When you've got to profess that you've changed 200%

12. "Only beggin' that I do is me beggin' your pardon" — Is There More

13. "Shifted your focus, lens lookin' jaded" — Jaded

14. "Back and forth to Italy, my comment section killin' me" — Can't Take a Joke

Necessary for when you've got people hyping you up already

15. "People are only as tough as they phone allows them to be" — Peak

Y'all can't have this one, I'm stealing it

16. "Work all winter, shine all summer" — That's How You Feel

Put in the work so you can flex on 'em, summer 18

17. "Blue faces, I got blue diamonds, blue tint, yeah" — Blue Tint


18. "I stay busy workin' on me" — Elevate

19. "Ten of us, we movin' as one" — Talk Up

The perfect reason to get the largest group picture you've had on your gram

20. "October baby for irony sake, of course" — March 14

This statistically applies to 1/12 of y'all reading this, so take that as you will (we October babies are the best)

21. "She had an attitude in the summer but now she nice again" — Blue Tint

22. "I know you special girl 'cause I know too many" — In My Feelings


23. "Gotta hit the club like you hit them, hit them, hit them angles" — Nice for What

24. "She said 'Do you love me?' I tell her, 'Only partly,' I only love my ____ and my ____ I'm sorry" — God's Plan

If you haven't used this one yet, get to it

25. "But I'm blessed I just checked, hate me never met me in the flesh" — I'm Upset

26. "It's only good in my city because I said so" — 8 Out of 10

Follow this up with a location and shoutout your hometown

27. "My haters either on they way to work or they arrived" — Can't Take a Joke

28. "I always need a glass of wine by sundown" — Final Fantasy

Has Drake ever been more relatable?

29. "It's your f***in' birthday. Happy birthday" — Ratchet Happy Birthday

Let's go get kicked out of an Applebee's

30. "I move through London with the Eurostep" — Nonstop


31. "I stopped askin' myself and I started feelin' myself" — Survival

Mood all summer 18

32. "They keep tryna' get me for my soul" — I'm Upset

33. "I'm tryna see who's there on the other end of the shade" — Emotionless

34. "Only obligation is to tell it straight" — Elevate

35. "It don't matter to me what you say" — Don't Matter to Me


This line from the King of Pop (MJ) will give you chills. R.I.P.

36. "I'm the chosen one, flowers never pick themselves" — Sandra's Rose

37. "Say you'll never ever leave from beside me" — In My Feelings

Couple goals, amirite?

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11 Things To Never Say To A Retail Worker

Because people actually say these things.

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I've worked in retail for years, and some of the things i've heard are truly ridiculous. While i love helping customers find their perfect item, here are some thing's i've been asked or told by customers that made me want to hide in the break room.

1. "Can you watch my child?"

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Hmm so I can double check if you like but i'm pretty sure when i signed up for this job i didn't sign up to be a babysitter as well. Sorry.

2. "Can you check the back?"

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A solid 99% of the time when someone asks if there is more stock of an item in the back, the employee has already checked the back for that item in the same day. Our job is to help people buy things, and we are typically rewarded for making more sales. So trust us, if we say we're out of an item then we are out of it.

3. "I'm never shopping here again"

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Well it's been a pleasant experience knowing you.

4. "Excuse me, I've been waiting in line for a long time"

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Yes, wow you are correct. In fact, let me just ignore everyone who was here before you and help you first.

5. "The item isn't scanning? It must be free!"

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Fake laughing at customers jokes is a big part of the job, but I've heard this so many times at this point it physically hurts to bring myself to laugh.

6. "May I use this coupon even though it's expired"

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Fun fact, we actually just put those expiration dates for fun. Yeah, no.

7. "Can I use your employee discount"

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Yes, random person I've just met. I will completely risk loosing my job to help you get 20% off your purchase today.

8. "This item was on the clearance rack and I won't pay full price for it"

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I can completely understand that it's frustrating since you thought the item was at a discounted price, but that doesn't mean i can magically change the price for you.

9. "Do you work here"

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No, i just bought the store uniform from a thrift shop and then come to the store to fool people like you.

10. "No, my card is not getting declined. It must be you"

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Well, i've successfully managed to check out 100 other customers today and all of their cards worked fine. So, I'm going to go ahead and say i'm not the problem here.

11. "Why does [insert store product] cost so much?"

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Just a warning, you may need to sit down for this one. Retail workers actually don't control the prices fo store products. Shocking, right?

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