I Hunger

I Hunger

I hunger for our fingers intertwined
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views

I hunger, but not for food

I hunger for your lips on mine

Both pair chapped and slightly wet

Chaste kisses, but kisses nonetheless

I hunger for your hands running ever so gently through my hair

Occasionally getting caught in a tangle

Which sends a small rush of pain up the back of my neck

I hunger for those chocolate colored eyes gazing into mine

I hunger for your touch, no matter how small

The brush of our knees

Your fingertips making circles on my shoulders

Or the back of my neck

I hunger for our fingers intertwined

Holding hands is easier to do than kissing

Because we are not like others

It doesn't matter because we still do it

And we will continue to do it

Cover Image Credit: pexels.com

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To 'That Guy' From High School, My Life Was Always Better Off Without You

I truly wish that I would have never met you.

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Silly me for thinking that you were forever - believing the promises and accepting all of your gifts. I took your words to heart: "I want you and only you for the rest of my life." You fantasized romance for me. I thought those feelings were only possible in the movies. I raved about you, spoke so highly about you, and about how I could see a future with you. Silly me.

Silly me for losing friendships over you. I had best friends before you. But then you had me convinced that you were the only person that I needed. They all warned me but I was blinded by your love. There was no way that they could've been right. You were so sweet. You would have never. Silly me.

Silly me for choosing you over experience. You controlled every ounce of my being. I wanted to go out without you but I wasn't allowed. I missed so much because of you and I thought that was normal. I was no longer an individual but rather someone who's life was dictated by someone else's opinions. You told me what was right and wrong. Silly me.

Silly me for believing what you said about my body. I was perfectly content before you came along. But yet there I was, attempting to lose weight and wear more makeup because you told me to. I became a new person around you - one that I didn't like. But I did it anyway, for you. Silly me.

Silly me for thinking I was the only one. I believed the lies that come flowing out of your mouth as if they had been rehearsed for days. You conditioned your eyes to innocence - and I believed them without a doubt. Silly me.

Silly me for not picking up on the signs. Your lies had been inconspicuously drilled into my head. I couldn't even think straight. You had me overcome with emotion to the point where I ignored the hints: the texts with other girls, the lies, the rumors. It all went unnoticed. Silly me.

Silly me for giving you the time of day after I found out what you did. I had always heard of people being cheated on but I never thought that it would've happened to me. Yet, there I was trying to justify why it was okay for you to cheat on me 20+ times. You had me questioning what did wrong to make you not want me. You made me question myself and who I was. Silly me.

And silly me for not knowing my worth earlier on. You stole my happiness, you stole my confidence, you stole my voice, you stole my trust - things I will never be able to fully regain ever again.

I still think about it from time to time, and when I do - I hate myself for ever letting you have that control over me. I truly wish I would've never met you because my life would have been so much better off without you.

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10 Things Girls Actually Want Guys To Know

We hide our feelings most of the time because we are scared about how you will react.

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Guys say that girls are complicated because we never really show how we feel or we keep stuff in. But, the stuff we want them to know is pretty much common sense. So, to help us be less complicated here are 10 things girls actually want guys to know.

1. We want to be respected!

We have needs just like you do and we want you to respect us. We don't like to be disrespected and honestly when you disrespect us it's a really big turn off.

2. Stop being a douche in college in college and grow up.

We have to deal with douches in high school and when we graduated we were beyond happy when we didn't have to deal with them anymore. We come to college and we expect to deal with boys that are grown up and adults. We are tired of being games and we want a grown man and not a grown man that acts like he is still in high school. So, if you are that guy please stay away from us.

3. We don't have to talk or see each other everyday. 

We need our own space too. We may like to spend time with you but, we need our girl time. We mainly just wanna know you care about us even when we are not around.

4. It is hard for us to show our feelings. 

We want to show you our feelings but, it is super hard for us. We don't want to be "that girl". We don't want you to tell your boys that we are crazy because we tell you our feelings and we are also scared that when we do that you will leave.

5. We aren't your crazy ex!

Please don't assume that we'll treat or do you dirty like they did. We are all different and we don't like being treated or compared to or even have you thinking that we are your crazy ex. That will actually push us away so please stop thinking that.

6. Communication is KEY!

It's not that hard to send us a simple text telling us that you are busy or that you have something going on and you will talk to us later. We know that you are busy and we just wanna know what's going on because if you don't text back we will drive ourselves crazy worrying about you. Please just communicate with us.

7. Girls find out everything!

We can find out absolutely everything even when we don't want too. We tell and talk to our friends about you and they even feel like they basically know you. So, when you do something just know we will be the first to know because girls tell everything and it will get to me before you hear it. So, don't do anything stupid because we don't like to look like a fool.

8. Admit your feelings!

Just tell us how you feel about us. When you don't we stay up all night and wonder how you actually feel. We are not just your late night call when you're lonely because that makes us think that you actually don't feel the way we feel. Just let us know how you feel.

9. Don't convince me or guilt me!

When I don't want to do something or go somewhere, don't try to make me feel bad about it or try to talk me into it. When you do this we end up not enjoying anything and we'll be miserable the whole time. We are our own person and we are stubborn so stop making us do stuff.

10. We want you to hang with your friends. 

Yes, we enjoy spending time with you. But, hang out with your boys. We aren't here to keep you away from them. We have friends to and we want to spend time with our girls. So, go hang with your boys and we'll go and hang out with our girls because our girls actually keep us sane.

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