"When look at the past and just really want to go home or see how home has changed. But you know you are inescapably trapped. You don't know what to do or who to turn to. All you want to is to be heard, really heard. Not just the gentle hello and chit chat, but what deep down is really bothering you and pulling you into the deep abyss you are digging yourself into. What you really want most is the chance to go back and remember, look back and be able to reminisce. And then you look at where you are, and realize you can't."
A few weeks ago I wrote this on my Instagram. For me home or what seemed to be home looked so far away. Constantly we as people are searching for a place to consider home. The quickest answer for most is to say where they are currently living or are at the moment. What if though, you met someone like me, one of the many homeless of the world. We come from every background; the refugee, the soldier's kid, the business kid and the list goes on. We all wished that we could call somewhere home. We wish we could be normal like everyone else, yet we know that will never be. We each have been formed by different borders and different peoples and nations. We form different stereotypes from the rest of the world, many of us don't understand world issues that seem like the can be so simply fixed. We sometimes feel like we are mentally different and will never be able to connect with anyone. I felt this way for many years.
Surprisingly though, the right conditions were given and I was able to connect with some. Ever since I moved back to my passport country it has been hard for me to connect with monoculturals (those who have grown up in one culture). Before college started though I went on a ten day hiking trip with complete strangers. Little would I know that this group of people, would be people who I would really come to confide in. A few of whom had never left the country. One of the biggest things that stood out to me was what my fellow group mates said and it was so profound to me that I constantly think about it. She said " People are People" and what I took from this was that like those of us who have grown up overseas and just want to be heard, so do others who are monoculturals. I also learned from this that I could actually connect with monoculturals. These may seem like simple or obvious take aways, but for me they were profound, because for the last three years, I had been rejected and ridiculed by monoculturals.
Now back to the question of home. I have come to realize that I may never consider somewhere home again, but I will be able to consider a group of people as a psuedo-home. Not that I won't stop missing the place I called home and then had to leave or really want to go back. But I know that by God's sovereign power I am able to connect with those who have never left their home countries. So I say to all you out there who want to be heard, reach out. People are here and waiting. Also you who haven't grown up overseas I ask you just to be conscious of this issue.
