My birthright trip to Israel was one of the greatest experiences of my life, but on the day I was departing to begin my trip I was more terrified than I have ever been before. My mom went with me to the airport. I walked as slow as I could toward the security line to enter my terminal, fighting the urge to run back and just go home. She was one level below me, standing in one place, watching me leave until she could no longer see me anymore. The thought, “This could be the last time you see her” was on repeat in my head the entire time. I was terrified and my nerves were going crazy. Being a girl who has never gone a week without seeing her family and always having her twin sister by her side at pretty much every moment, to being a traveler flying across the world to a completely foreign country, alone, was seriously overwhelming.
The sign up for this trip is done months in advance, so it is hard to really understand how you are going to feel when the time actually comes to depart. While planning it I was everything but scared. I planned it out so I would stay an extra two weeks after the initial ten days with my birthright group. I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
Finally the time had arrived. I had the plane tickets reserved for my trip there and my trip back, I made accommodations to stay on my friend’s couch during my extension, my money was exchanged to Shekels, and finally I downloaded whatsapp to my phone since I wouldn't have the ability to send texts in Israel. It was now time to leave, but I was not even close to emotionally ready yet. It was the Fourth of July, I had just spent the weekend with my best friends and family in my favorite place: Mandalay Beach Resort in Oxnard. As I walked to the car, I kept turning around to look back at my sister following me. I did not want to go on this trip without my best friend. At this point my heart was pounding and I was ready to have a panic attack.
Luckily I spent the first day of my month long trip with my Uncle in New York. That definitely helped to calm my nerves.
The next day, I finally met my birthright group at the LGA airport. It was really comforting to have them all there, knowing we were all on this journey together. Even though they started off as total strangers, I can honestly say they felt like family by the end of the trip.
As the trip progressed, I would have moments where I just couldn't handle being away from my family anymore, especially when I would turn around (out of habit) to talk to my sister and realizing she was not there. That was probably the hardest part. But that is where my growth as an individual really began. When I met people and created memories, it was all on my own. I really needed that. I was actually just Rachael, not “Sarah’s sister” or “the twin”.
I also got to gain the experience of living with other girls in a small room, before moving to my apartment at UC Riverside. Without my Israel experience before hand, I know that transition would have been much more difficult. I also got to gain a sense of what it will be like without my family and close friends always next to me. I never was able to take myself out of my comfort zone or test my limits as an individual. Of course, I've had many experiences that has made me who I am today, but living in Israel, living in their culture, making new friends, learning how to get around an unknown area on my own without internet, and exploring my roots made me so much stronger than anything I have ever done!
It was truly an exhilarating ride and I recommend it for everyone to do.
