To any and all of my readers out there—my college and I have suffered a loss this week.
An incredibly talented, copiously brilliant, and dedicated friend of mine passed Friday morning in a hit-and-run. A meaningless, cruel, abrupt end to someone's life. A person. A person's life.
He had a family. Close friends. Friends. Acquaintances. Passersby. Strangers. Potential.
I first met Anique Ashraf at one of my early Spectrum meetings sophomore year. In Spectrum, several others and I discussed and developed ideas regarding the LGBT+ movement, both within campus and beyond it. When Anique came to this meeting, he brought so much more to the table than I had previously thought about; he announced at the first meeting that he was holding for a new group, Queer People of Color, or QPOC. Nothing like QPOC had ever been on our campus.
He was always full of brilliant, innovative ideas. Nothing slowed him down.
Anique and I weren't the closest of friends, but of course he was always so kind to me. If he saw me sad, or even tired, he'd smile and say, "What's wrong, girl? Whatever it is—it's gonna be okay. You're gonna be fine." Or some variation of that. He'd chat to me about the latest dramas of his life, gossip about new hairdos, question his teachers, discuss his favorite shows. Anique always had something to talk to me about and to everyone else about. And he never left anything unquestioned.
When I walk around campus today, I find myself looking for his face. I never used to seek it out. I would honestly just expect to see it, and therefore hardly look for it. He was just one of those faces, just one of those people. I subconsciously thought I'd see him almost every day.
I've lost family members before. I've lost pets before. I've lost family friends. But...
I've never lost a friend. And not so abruptly, so brutally, so out of nowhere. Death doesn't give you a second chance to say goodbye to a person. But when it takes your family away, takes your friend away, and you didn't get a chance to say goodbye—that's when life is at its most surreal.
Are you actually dead? I still can't believe it. I know it's a cliche to say, but wow, this is surreal. I'm terrified for the shock to hit. I'm terrified for it to hit anyone that you knew, because Anique, you really changed your friends' lives. More than you realized.
When I first met you, I believed I'd met someone with more initiative than almost any adult I've encountered. With more respect for others, with more confidence in themselves. You weren't afraid of anything.
Come back. We need you here.
RIP Anique Ashraf. Gone too soon. Don't be gone.
