Sometimes dating is viewed as exhausting. The thought of having to possibly go through another negative outcome or situation from the past is nauseating. But that's only one viewpoint. You can look at dating positively: Isn't it wonderful to share a special connection with another human and see what truly makes your heart tick (and insides cringe)? The more you date, the more you learn about what should be in a healthy relationship and what should not.
The following is a list of 15 pieces of advice I and close friends have taken from past relationships:
1. Talking on the phone (even if it's for 5 minutes to simply say hello) is better than texting about nothing all day. I mean, think about it. All you'll be doing is working your way towards arthritis.
2. Don't go to bed upset. Say goodnight and continue the conversation the next day.
3. Speaking of being upset--don't argue through text message. Pick up the phone if you can't meet in person.
4. If you have tendency to get overly jealous, keep an eye on them. Is he actually being shady or is it your paranoia again?
5. Regarding jealousy--ladies, it's unattractive. You're you. No one else is you. Isn't that enough?
6. You don't need to know what your S.O. is doing 24/7. Sorry, you're his girlfriend, not Helicopter Mom.
7. Don't use the line "I have trust issues" as a constant excuse for irrational behavior towards your S.O. Really? Either the trust is there or it's not. If you have issues from past situations, get them fixed...with a professional. (NOT your S.O.).
8. Stop freaking out if he doesn't answer for a longer period than usual. 1) Does your life consist of you staring at your phone awaiting his name to pop up? 2) Does your world only revolve around him?
9. Do not coddle him. He's a grown man. Your his girlfriend, not his mother.
10. Continue your hobbies you started before you even met him (if you're still passionate about them). If you're not, find new exciting ones. After all, wouldn't it be unattractive if your S.O. was not passionate about anything?
11. Quality is always greater than quantity when it comes to matters of the heart. I rather get a piece of gravel that has significant meaning than a necklace that was chosen with no special intention.
12. You're in a relationship, not a business deal. Cut out any manipulative behavior. Sometimes, the two of you just have to sacrifice some things in order to reach other's needs.
13. I get it, sometimes PDA can be obnoxious. But no matter what you say, holding hands is NOT obnoxious PDA. It's a normal genuine act of affection. In an article published by The Huffington Post, it was stated that holding hands can actually improve feelings of trust.
14. Cuddle. According to an article about cuddling and relationships by Your Tango, cuddling is what will save your relationship. It will give the two of you a form of intimacy that sex cannot.
15. Don't put one another down. Avoid name calling. Improvement won't be reached by belittling. You're each other's number one fans, remember?
Sheetal Tadiparty
Flickr Creative Commons
