By flicking on the TV to find lambasting political commercials and scrolling through Twitter and stumbling upon dank memes, it is evident that the 2016 presidential election is upon us. This means it is now your time to perform your duty as an American citizen. What is this duty you ask? Viciously express each and every political opinion you hold on every social media platform you use. However, you can't just log on and type away. There are a few rules that must be followed when posting about your political beliefs.
1. Unfriend and unfollow ANYONE who has a differing political opinion than you do.
This is the first step that must be taken before you post anything. That way, no one will influence you to consider the other side.
2. Focus on ad-hominem traits.
Reading about a candidate's political positions and credentials is boring. What people really need to know when deciding on a president is if they've had a bad hair day or which deodorant they use.
3. Use vulgar and explicit language.
Nothing gets a convincing point across like the F-bomb. Its intensity speaks for itself.
4. Slay any person who tries to prove you wrong.
If they don't like your political opinion, just rip apart their personality and lifestyle choices and family. How dare they have a different belief. That's just rude.
5. Don't read the entire political articles you share.
If you read the first four sentences of an article about a candidate, that's really all you need. Share that thing with all of your friends. You have the general gist of the article. It probably isn't satire or false because, well, it's on the Internet.
6. Bash the candidate you like the least.
Who needs to know qualities about the candidate you believe could do a good job? Instead, make sure you point out and stretch every negative idea and life decision your least favorite candidate has ever made. It's much more productive.
7. Don't inform yourself.
One of the most frustrating things about people who post about politics is when they actually have evidence to back up their words. It's impossible to poke holes in an argument when it's bulletproof. Make it fun for your followers and make sure the things you post are at least 40 percent inaccurate.
Presidential election season is a very important and fragile time in our nation, with media having a tight grip on our nation nowadays and incredibly impressionable citizens having the ability to get whatever information they please. Even if they don't please, voters get fed information day in and day out about the presidential candidates. So before you decide topmost on Facebook or Twitter or any other media platform about your political views, make sure to remember these seven simple requirements.
