1. Invite up to 25 of your most promising Tinder matches to a swanky location. Ask them all deeply personal questions after showing them a montage of yourself running around your hometown. Finish the night by dramatically handing out roses to your chosen few and send the rejects off until the reunion.

2. Challenge yourself and your friends to make an avant-garde outfit out of an old pizza box, your ex-roommate's ugly Christmas sweater, and dental floss. Eliminate the friend with the ugliest outfit. Never speak to them again.

3. At your next family reunion, continually slip away to talk trash in a private interview. Cue dramatic music anytime you feel a confrontation coming on.

4. Get a group of friends together for a camping trip. Conveniently forget to bring any food, shelter, clothing, or water. Ditch your cell phones and car. Survive.

5. Go on an exotic vacation with all but one of your closest friends. Tell her she wasn't invited because her angles on Instagram weren't strong enough.

6. Get a carrot-hue spray tan. Give yourself a hilarious nickname. Head to the beach.

7. Convince yourself that you can cook. Ignore the critics who claim that a peanut butter sandwich isn't a "real meal" or that you "broke the toaster."

8. After receiving a million dollar loan from your father, spend most of your time telling C-level celebrities that they are, in fact, fired. Eventually, run for president.

Wait, that can't be right.

9. Most importantly, consistently check your ratings and keep an eye on your social media presence. Establish your "brand." Make sure the only thing you create is problems and live your life to entertain others. Remember, if it wasn't documented, it didn't really happen.