I grew up in a small town in New Jersey. I like to call it a "drive-thru town" because one straight road literally goes right through it into the next, making people not even realize they drove through it. I also like to say that my hometown is a small southern town, but in the north. I say these things simply because, everyone knows everyone (and their business), people leave and come back, and not much changes.

I am by no means bashing my quaint little town because I absolutely adore it. When I went away to school (even though it is a short drive away), I actually missed my town a lot. Now that I have been back home for summer break for not even two weeks, something has just not felt right. I know it's not the gym that opened up, the condos being developed or the storefront that some car plowed right through that is making me uneasy. I'm unsettled because, nothing has changed.

Seems odd, right? That my hometown is just as I left it, and now I waltz in complaining that it's the same old square-mile on the map. What bothers me the most is, nothing here changed, but I did. Now, I am not saying that I changed in a bad way. My year away at school has made me a better version of myself, and I filled my year with a lot of great people, memories and experiences. But, how is it that the small town girl went off to college, and now feels out of place?

I've thought about this long and hard while I unpacked too many boxes and bins, babysat some loud children, and laid in my bed watching Netflix this past week. I've come to the conclusion that home is where you return to for the memories, for the people, and for the comfort. You don't return home to find yourself; you leave to find yourself. Changing who you are, for the better, is the purpose of experiencing new things, for traveling, for breaking out of your comfort zone.

Two years ago, I pictured myself commuting to county college. Yet, here I am dorming at a state university. During the countless college tours I went on, I'd side-eye my mom when she asked about Greek Life, and here I am, a sister of Delta Phi Epsilon. These events and choices in my life have shown me that I have changed.

I've heard many stories about kids that go home for breaks from school, and cannot wait to go back. I can relate at times, when I miss my friends or my freedom, my own space. But, I'm proud to love my town as much as I do, unchanged or not, it's my home. I used to take my town for granted. And don't get me wrong, sometimes it is way too small. But nothing beats having the guy at Dunkin' know your order because you've been going there since you could remember. Or seeing the same old men at the diner where they always hang out. Or having the same teachers that your mom had, and finding out that she babysat your 6th-grade math teacher back in the day. These are the little things that you get out of living in a small town, that many people cannot relate to. But more importantly, these are the little things I look forward to when I return home (even the side street that is still unpaved and bumpy).

Although I have changed, I've realized that my roots will remain the same. The memories I've created both home and away will forever be a part of me. The lessons I've learned have gotten me to where I am, and I'm grateful for that. But most importantly, I've accepted that change comes in many ways and at different times. In my case, I've changed. My town remains the same, the people are still stuck in their ways, and I hope that never changes. My hometown has become my marker for my personal growth and change, and hopefully, years from now, I'll be able to come back and find out even more about myself.