Dear Future Son,
I have already saved a giant place in my heart for you. But at the same time, I'm terrified.
There has been a lot of violence in the world. Many people are being murdered. A lot of that has been happening to black boys just like you. They have been forced to leave this Earth way before their time. It had me thinking about you a lot lately.
The world isn’t ready for you. I don’t know when or if it will be, but that doesn’t mean that you aren’t ready for the world.
I know you are not physically here with me but that doesn't mean that I didn't want to start preparing for you. I will read endlessly about the black men who are your predecessors. The men who your schoolbooks skim over. The men that make school teachers' tongues numb.
I will teach you about the stars that they have created, and I will point them out to you in the sky. Finding constellations will become our shared hobby.
I will keep my body strong, to make sure that when you come the arrival will be as smooth as Egyptian silk.
I will pick a mate that will be the King to your Prince. He will raise you to see yourself as royalty and that you should be treated as such. He will teach you things about this world that I don't even know. Hopefully, he has already written his letter.
I will pick out a name fitting of your destiny. One that will hold you up when you feel you cannot walk anymore. Strong.
You are as real as you can be, and I want to cherish you.
You are living in a world that has painted you as a volatile threat from the moment you will leave my womb. That is not who you are. I know it already and you are only but a twinkle in my eye.
Who knows what you will accomplish when you are actually here and you can express yourself to your heart's content!
What I know, is that you were meant to thrive. You are magic. You are hope. You are passion. You are destined to do great, beautiful things.
And, that’s why I need you to live.
Despite all those that yearn for your demise, you will persevere. I must say that I am so scared to bring you into this world. The state of our nation is in such shambles. But hopefully, when you decide to make your grand entrance, the world will be in a more peaceful and loving place. But, even if it isn't, I will love you and protect you until the day that I die.
I will welcome you with open arms when you are ready to come, even though the world may not.
And I will do everything I can to make sure that you live. I will do everything to remind you that you matter. You are my son.
Love,
Your Future Mom