Following the leader can be inspiring and helpful, but after awhile the footsteps you are filling do not become your own. Meeting demands, fitting into that square peg, there is no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Going through the motions does not have to be set on a one-track path. Take a lesson from Patrick Bateman: be ahead of the curve; just avoid murdering in order to get there. Here are five myths you find out from going your own way.
1. Being outside the group is worse for you.
Beyond the fear of missing out is the love of being missed. There is no harm in socializing and taking part in the festivities but following the crowd all the time can be self-defeating. Developing who you are is a personal journey and it may take a village, but it only takes one person to discover who you are: yourself.
2. Being inside your head is a bad habit.
People who say you think too much do not sound like they do much thinking. Can thinking too much keep you from doing more? Sure, but can you ever think too much? Thinking more and more often is never a bad thing. Think twice, think thrice, think more than once. Being alone with your thoughts is one of the best ways to assess yourself and process your life.
3. You should act your age.
This is impossible. Since when do numbers behave a certain way? Have you ever met a devious thirty-two? How about a cowardly number eight? Acting your age is about as sensible as acting your street number. Acting right however is possible. You do not act like everyone else just because that is what is going on. You stay you regardless of how others see you or expect you to be.
4. People will like you if you do what they want.
Not everyone is going to like you. No one will like you just because you do what they want either. You are not interested in their self-interest and you do not need to explain yourself to people who do not see you for who you are. If someone does not like you, the reasons are not for you to dissect and understand. Forget the worry, and be the best you can be for people who care about you and the type of person you are.
5. You should do this or be more like so-and-so.
Anyone that suggests that you be a certain way or that you should be fitting into a cookie-cutter mold does not know how to be their own person. The intentions may have been good, but the unseen, unoriginal sameness is its own solipsistic hell. Everyone has a role, but your role does not have to be set in concrete. Suggestions are suggestions, actions are actions, and an individual is an individual. Thinking twice and outside the box is not only normal, but smart and beneficial for everyone and yourself.
Being someone you aren't does not look good on you. You looks good on you.