Multiple thoughts flash through my mind as my graduation date inches closer and closer. When I was a freshman, it seemed as if all I wanted was to be a senior, to escape the crowded hallways of Francis Lewis High School. Now with barely any time left of my high school career, I find myself wishing to be that awkward freshman again. It's difficult to think about starting over again at a new school. It's burdensome to think about leaving the place that's been your home for four years. In some ways I believe high school is harder to leave when you aren't just another face in the crowd when you're a person that becomes so involved that you spend more time at the school then your home.
As senior year draws to a close, I've felt so many different emotions. There's a side of me that is excited. It's the thought that four years of stress, late nights and hard practices weren't wasted away. It's the feeling that I'll be leaving home and living in a completely new place without my parents by my side. I'm overcome with joy when i think about starting college with my best friend. It's exhilarating to think that I'll be living on my own with no one there to keep a tab on me at all times. However, along with excitement comes a whirlwind of emotions that never seem to stop.
The next emotion that comes is fear. I have these thoughts that when I leave I won't be successful. There are these doubts in my head that I should have stayed home where I knew I would be comfortable. Then I think about all the friendships that I've developed and how they'll be lost as time passes. My biggest fear is that I won't succeed in college as I did in high school. In a way, the fear builds character and allows for the thoughts of adventure and new beginnings. With fear comes the excitement, but then there's an emotion I never really expected to feel.
As we got into June, I began to feel sad that high school is coming to a close. Reality had truly set in when softball season had ended. After spending four amazing years with my team, it was all over. I had realized that I would never put my jersey on again or play as a Patriot. Every day I spend in the Student Government office, I realize that I won't be here next year. It's the thought that everything will just move on without me like it did for the people who graduated last year, how it will next year too and the year after that. That's the point of high school, though, to move on to bigger and better things.
As graduation comes around, I have one giant piece of advice for the class of 2017. Don't let your senior year fly by! Cherish all the time you have left because high school does end. People always say, "When one door closes another door opens." So as the door of a wonderfully discovered high school experience closes, the undiscovered and adventurous door of college opens. With graduating comes change and that's a change I'm willing to embrace.
