As the school year comes to a close, we find ourselves looking back to where we were a year ago. The thing is, when you are a freshman just starting college, you have heard the stories, “people change, get used to it." People always tell you that after high school ends, so do friendships, but you never believe it until it happens to you. High school friendships are exactly what they sound like…high school. Some people leave it behind, and some people keep the high school attitude. Growing up is not easy, but when you are forced to free fall your way into maturing, it happens really quickly. The friendships that you make your freshman year of college, will change the way you look at your old friendships forever.
Something I have come to realize is that if you go to a different college than your best friend, they expect you to have the same experience as them. If they hate college, you are supposed to too, if they're having problems making friends, you're supposed to too… etc. The thing is that with high school friends, you are never the same as your friend. You bond over liking each other despite these differences. Do not get me wrong, it works, and it still can after high school, but only to a certain extent. There is something that makes you feel very secure when you get a best friend in college that always understands how you are feeling, what you're thinking, and almost always agrees with you. No one ever says it, but you are not supposed to fight with your best friend. Best friends are the people that you choose, and that choose you, it is supposed to be easy. Not to say that you cannot argue or bicker with your best friend, but if it results in ignoring each other, or talking behind their back, it is probably not meant to be.
College friends look out for you. Being a female on campus can be a scary thing, things happen, and at parties you should always have someone looking out for you, and vice versa. Things like this are really important in college because you face a different set of social rules and dangers, it can definitely be hard to navigate. In high school, no one really HAD to look out for anything, sure if someone drank a little too much you would drive them home, but beyond that, everyone knew each other. You were facing a maximum of 2,000 people to worry about rather than 20,000+.
In high school money did not matter. It still does not matter, but if you are like me, depending on the federal government completely to fund your education, and your friend is not and they complain about buying their own school books or something like that, it can be very taxing to pretend to be sympathetic. You find yourself keeping your opinions to yourself a lot more than you ever had to, and then you realize that this is the big bad friendship drift that everyone was talking about. Friendship breakups can be harder than relationship break ups. It is harder to realize that a friendship is toxic because when a relationship is toxic, it is your friends that tell you. When to move on from a friendship can be a lot harder to navigate, but you will know it is right after have have done it and you feel a weight off your shoulders.
