Losing your first love is a heartache that feels like it will never ever stop hurting. I believe that you go into a relationship knowing that you will either break up, or get married, and you always hope for the beneficial outcome.
Your first love is like something taken right out of a fairytale. Everything is perfect and exactly how you want it to be. You think to yourself, "He's the one." You cannot picture yourself being with anyone else, ever. You talk about your future together, make plans, and become so excited about something that, in reality, is still so uncertain. He makes you feel like you are the only thing in the world that matters to him. He says things to you that make you tear up because you can't believe that you have finally found someone so perfect. Everything is exactly how you want it to be until one day, everything just changes.
Things start heading downhill and your anxiety is at an all time high. You do not know what's going to happen. You know what to do that's best for you, but you don't want to do it. You don't want to end something that once seemed so perfect. You think that there has to be something that can be done to fix everything and make it go back to normal. The unfortunate reality is, if it wasn't meant to be, then you need to let it go. You take so long trying to fix things that it just comes to the point where he ends it with you and you feel your whole world stop.
They say that if you love something, you need to let it go, and if it comes back, then it's yours. Some people may find comfort in this, but I feel like it's a sense of false hope. When he's gone, he's gone. He isn't coming back. People always tell you that "he treated you so bad" and "he doesn't deserve you!" But the reality that only you can realize is, no matter how much he hurt you in the end, you don't regret one single second you spent with him. Those feelings were once there for both of you, something just changed.The feelings, the love, and the memories don't fade. They just become a part of your past as you move on.
He's not coming back. It may take weeks, months, or maybe even years before you can come to terms with that, but once you do, you feel as if you're free. And you can think back on the memories with a smile instead of tears coming to your eyes. My first love was one I'll never forget, and someone I will never ever regret being with. God puts people in your path for a reason. Some people may stay in your life for a little bit, some may stay forever. It's all part of a plan.
If you're going through a heartbreak, it's hard, it's so incredibly hard. You cry yourself to sleep at night, you stare at a blank phone screen waiting for his name to come up, you keep hope alive that he will just come back. You can't do this. He's most likely not coming back, and you have to learn to live with it.
