Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays alike, I walk a little grudgingly to math class. I'm seated near the front, sandwiched between two friends. But my heart races a little, and I get that little fluttery feeling at the bottom of my heart. It's the kind I got as a kid growing up, because my mind was always stuck in the clouds instead of the material that was supposed to be learned.

I never had the answers. Math is not something I am confident in, it simply never came easy to me. The numbers felt like slow, slow molasses, trying so very hard to squeeze and snake their way through my brain. I felt stupid, I felt like "the dumb kid." As everyone else started gaining speed, started gaining understanding, I was stuck behind having to be pulled aside to learn long division, while struggling with simple addition.

This fractured a little part of my self-confidence, and it carries through to today's math class. I remembered feeling utterly shattered after a particular bout with word problems recently.

And so, I speak negatively over myself. When answering a problem, instead of facing the board with full confidence, I hold back. "Ugh, the answer could be 42, but I could be wrong, I usually am."

And people have noticed. They notice my timidity, my diminished self-confidence. Someone recently approached me asking, "Why do you always say that? I've never heard you answer a question [with confidence]." They noticed how I hold myself back, how I find the need to silence myself so I won't look like "the dumb kid."

But let me tell you a little secret; words hold immense power. Not because they are a string of little intonations, but because with each word comes great meaning. With words comes history, emotion and drive, each containing the power to break and destroy, or to build and make new. By speaking over ourselves, we shape the paths we will take. I am shaping my life with every word I utter. I am shaping myself into a crippling mess of self-defeat. I am becoming the very thing I wish never to be.

Think about it. With only a few words, God spun this entire earth into motion. The sea, the stars, the fish that leap and the animals that bound over the plains, He did that with just breath and sound. And everything continues spinning. Isaiah 55:12 says, "You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands." That's simply gorgeous to me, this sort of personification. The mountains, the trees, all of creation knows the Maker's voice. And, they are fully confident in their God.

So, where do we find confidence? Why do we think of ourselves as ugly, stupid, worthless and small? I think the world has spoken too closely to us, comparing us to "ideal" images that hold no true beauty, images that don't even understand beauty. Because you are not a porcelain doll, you are not an airbrushed model walking tall down a runway. You are created by someone who hung constellations with calloused hands, who beckons the tide to kiss the shore, and who gives us a watercolored sky of gold, pink and orange with every closing day. You are not an empty image on an empty screen, created by a vacant illustration of beauty by man's flawed hand.

Carl Rogers once wrote, "People are just as wonderful as sunsets if you let them be. When I look at a sunset, I don't find myself saying, "Soften the orange a bit on the right hand corner." I don't try to control a sunset. I watch with awe as it unfolds."

You are being watched with awe. Your Father is incredibly proud of you, His very own creation. Our beauty is not held in the wavering opinions of others, whether they be friends, family or romantic interests. Humans can be faulty things, we look through kaleidoscope lenses that warp who we truly are. Our opinions change like day and night. Psalm 139:14 tells us, "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

Beautiful is not an opinion, beautiful is a fact. What if we went through our day simply knowing, knowing that we held the gorgeous breath of God in our lungs? What if we walked with purpose, knowing that there is a reason our hearts were beating and pumping precious blood throughout our bodies?

Perhaps there is power in "faking it until you make it." I challenge, and I encourage you to speak life over yourself. When we speak death over ourselves, we receive a certain death to our minds. We view our world through that warped lens, seeing one another and ourselves as unworthy.

And when we fail, we can learn to bow with humility. During math class, I can learn to giggle at myself, knowing that my incorrect answer can pave the way to understanding in the end. Because yes, you and I will mess up. But you are no less beautiful than the brothers and sisters that surround you.

I don't think you're beautiful, I know you're beautiful. I know you were created by Goodness, for good. I know your freckles were placed like the constellations, I know your laughter touches each person you meet and your heart was painted like the dawn and dusk of each day. Walk, run and dance with confidence in our Creator.