Bread Is My Greatest Enemy. Yes, Bread.

Bread Is My Greatest Enemy. Yes, Bread.

No, I am not allergic. No, I am not on a diet.

Dry, crumby, floppy, flavorless.

How could anyone find any delight in consuming such a substance? I am most likely one of the only inhabitants on the planet who abhors bread. No, I am not allergic. No, I am not on a diet. The taste and texture cause a visceral reaction where I literally cringe in my skin. Even the thought of bread conjures up haunting images of well-intentioned Italian waiters delivering baskets that must be quickly removed by my sister. And at lunch, my friends think it’s funny to rub bread on me, but it’s not funny. It freaks me out.

I was six years old the last time I ate bread. I do not remember many events from that age, so the fact that I recall this incident proves how major it was. My babysitter prepared me a peanut butter sandwich for dinner. I had never eaten bread before, but I was not completely opposed to the idea of trying it. Therefore, I bit into the repulsive sandwich. I immediately leaped from my chair and dashed to the sink. I then threw my entire head under the faucet in an effort to cleanse my victimized mouth of the unsavory injury.

My distaste for bread has resulted in awkward situations with people who are unaware of my unusual repulsion. As a shy child, I remember turning down playdates simply because I was embarrassed to request a specially-prepared lunch. However, when faced with this obstacle, I never succumbed to eating bread. Even now, there are countless dinner episodes in which friends and family offer me money in exchange for a nibble of a roll, but I always reject any type of dough— even if it’s green.

Refusing bread is a microcosm of how I know what I want and am not afraid to advocate for it. Like the time I narrowly missed the qualifications to move up to a more challenging English class, but had worked so hard that I convinced my teacher to bend the rules. Or my sophomore year, when I used every second on the lacrosse field to showcase my abilities, resulting in a spot on the varsity team. Being a successful and thriving student at the University of Richmond is my current goal, and, just like avoiding bread, my determination to do so is unwavering.

Cover Image Credit: Imgur

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.


Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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10 Reasons To Start Vaping In 2019 If You Haven't Yet

"It's safer than cigarettes"


Vaping is the rage these days among adolescents and college students. Here are some great reasons to start!

1. It's what all the cool kids do


I wish that I could be like the cool kids

2. It damages your lungs

It's not like you need these to breathe or anything

3. It pollutes the air

Let's pollute the air even more!

4. Nicotine addiction

Just the thing I want to be addicted to

5. "Delicious" flavors

Would you prefer mango flavor or the cancer flavor?

6. The Juul looks like a USB

Your parents won't suspect a thing

7. Inhale metals like nickel and lead

Yummmmmm. Lead poisoning isn't a thing.

8. More likely to get infections


9. You'll eventually want cigarettes

And you'll make your lungs worse

10. Lung and mouth cancer

Who doesn't want cancer

In case you couldn't tell, this was very sarcastic. If you want all of these things, then go ahead, start vaping. But you should know what you're getting yourself into and be prepared for the consequences.

If you already vape, I mean no disrespect and I'm not trying to hate on you, but you should seriously stop. Whatever you think is a good reason for vaping really is not a good enough reason to damage your body.

Stop vaping. And if you don't vape, don't start. Just don't.

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