As the holiday train rapidly arrives at the station of our lives, the world is suddenly depicted to have a world-wide happiness. It's a switch as fast as electricity running through the wires as we turn on the button on the switch to turn on the lights. It's officially the holiday season, but we are not all jolly and in the spirit of bubbly holidays. In fact, for many of us, this is one of the worst seasons of our lives. Think about the mother who has lost their child, the mother who had a miscarriage, or had her son or daughter stolen by monstrous hands that believe it was okay to press a metal tube releasing bullets to innocent lives. What about the widow husband or wife that doesn't even have the energy to cook for the occasion because it will be for themselves only. The best friend that lost his own or the ones who lost a relative, a father or mother... Tears fill my eyes as I am here sharing pain with all of those amazing individuals suffering and mourning along with my persona. I know what pain feels like, I know what it is to deal with a loss... we don't, we just cry and think about all the memories for years and years.
What about those little girls that are missing their dads either because they are deceased or they rather walk away like a coward than to take care of their own flesh and bones. I feel your pain little girl, I lost my dad when I was four years old not because he abandoned me, he lost the battle and was defeated by cancer. Every birthday, every holiday, I cry silently alone in my room before putting my make up on and dressing up to walk out to greet family and friends. I feel your pain, my lovely readers; I know the feeling of a knot forming in your throat that kinda chokes you up and you want it to go away so bad yet you just break into rivers being released by the windows of your soul.
I am sorry you are dealing with sadness, the pain is inevitable. Let me tell you, no actually no! Let me not tell you the pain we share because you know what is like and it's something indescribable. Everyone says "it will pass" and "Stay Strong!", but will it pass? I don't feel strong, I feel at my weakest point where I break multiple times when I think of dad and all the others I've lost. Especially when it's Christmas or Thanksgiving and I see all these photographs floating around social media of happy couples, happy families, happy little girls who have both of their parents, and those who have what you are lacking or missing. Man, the holidays isn't our favorite, for some of us. All I ask is for those who haven't experience anything tragic similar to this, count your blessings and appreciate the presence of those surrounding you. Most of all I ask the comprehension, if we are not jolly or smiling as much, understand that there is something deeper out of our control and nothing will make us feel better than have that person back on earth or visit heaven quickly. Just give us a break, in time we will understand how a lot of things are out slippery from our finger tips and we can not continue beating ourselves down. Instead, everything you do, do it for them, our angels and during the holidays I know they are by our side in spirit. Rest in paradise to all our beautiful angels.
Happy Holidays? Not for all of us, hope now you can understand.
