I was hoping that one day you'd come back to me again — Somewhere, somehow... Again. I hoped for our paths to meet again... Once more...

''Hope'' is something that really helped me to continue on. Putting my faith in someone or something made it easier for me to live my life. A life that otherwise, felt had no purpose. Hope of one day having you return to me made it easier for me to swallow the idea that you were now gone. It was hope that kept me away from the truth. Hope kept me away from the reality I didn't want to face.

But I knew I had to face reality sooner or later. I couldn't pretend that you were mine every time your name popped up. I couldn't live a lie to make myself happy anymore. I needed to stop myself from dreaming. In order to do so, I needed to wake up. That was the only way I could untangle myself from the strings holding onto you.

You see, confrontation for me was scary. I was afraid of disappointing you. I knew that I probably had when you began growing distant from me. I knew you enough to know that I had done something in order for you stop talking to me. However, I did not want to know how exactly I managed to hurt you again. I was afraid that I couldn't make it up to you. I was afraid that this may have been the end of it. I was afraid... of everything. I was tired of letting you down. I couldn't face being a disappointment any longer... Not again. Please, not again. I must admit, I was selfish — you were right.

But so were you.

But with that aside, I was still happy. I was the happiest girl alive. I loved you. I knew I loved you... And I know that I still do love you. I have loved you like I have loved no other. Every experience I had in my life was shared with you... And I am more than proud to say you were my first everything, even if it all wasn't perfect... I loved even your smallest flaws... To the point where you, indeed, were perfect.

Now, another woman gets to share the happiness I once shared with you... How lucky of her. I hope you find the girl you wanted me to be— a girl that you do not have to change... And although no one is perfect, I hope that she is good enough for you.

I hope that you do not have to suffer another heartbreak again. I hope that you can trust again. I hope whatever I destroyed, can be rebuilt again by the hands of another. As selfless as this may sound, I feel obligated to say this. You deserve happiness. My fear stopped me from continuing a relationship with you and owning up to my own responsibilities. However, I do hope that one day, you can look back at me, and thank me for letting us go. I still think we met for a reason, but now that reason has become unclear. I hope that it is easier for you to fall in love all over again. We ''could of'' had it all, but do not make us a hindrance of what you ''can have.'' You deserve to be loved. I do not think anyone can love you the way I loved you, but I do think they will be able to treat you better than I have treated you...

But please know, please know the most important thing... You will get your heart torn again... I just hope that you are able to maintain yourself when you do... Not because of unfaithfulness, but because all love ends in loss. Life is all about ''love'' and ''loss.'' We love and we lose in this world whether it be emotionally, physically, mentally... Nothing is forever, but I hope that you find something worth lasting a lifetime.

I cannot chain you down to me any longer. You deserve to be free, just as I.

Happy Birthday, love. Please know deep in your heart, I loved you with every inch of my being... And I hope that in this world, you are given the happiness you always deserved.

Love, your best friend,

Saba