We all have had the addiction. We have all been guilty. We have all been victims of destination addiction, the preoccupation with the idea that happiness is waiting in the next place, the next job, or the next relationship. I read this the other day browsing through Facebook and came across this quote from Dr. Robert Holden, the author that created the term "destination addiction."
Do you live your life constantly waiting for when "it will be better"? Oh, it will be better when I have a different job, when I graduate from college, or when I get married, and the excuses could keep going. Immediately, you think, no way I do this! I definitely live my life at the moment! But, then you really think about it... are you? Each passing moment should not just be a step closer to the future. Your goal should have a great day, not just get through the day.
I, myself, have fallen guilty of this. I think we all have. Now there is no way that there won't be some days that you are just trying to push through, get through that hard test, have boring days at work, etc. However, this is part of your life. Not just the time being till things are better. Trust me when I say, the grass is not always greener on the other side. I have experienced this in many different situations in my life. "If I'm friends with them, more people will like me," "After college, things will be better," "If I just dated a guy that had his life together already then..." Do any of those sound familiar? I know they do for me.
I recently experienced this whole journey vs. destination so immensely, and it hit me hard. I went through my first year of college with the attitude of being done with college. I was going to class to get it over with. I wasn't enjoying that chapter of my life. I always told myself that things will be better after college, I'll be happier when I have a job and life will just all around just better. Well, guess what. My life isn't much different. I mean I am not saying in a bad way or trying to be negative. But, my life didn't just poof into a "better" life after college. I am happy and very blessed to have a degree that helped me get an amazing full-time job. But, looking back, I had a fun part-time job with great people. I had an apartment that wasn't my favorite but left me so many memories. I met friends there that I will have for a long time. I went to a university that I loved in a city that had so much to offer. I didn't focus on the journey.
It isn't the easiest thing and everyone does it. You can not live your life in a constant waiting period for happiness that is believed to be in the near future when really, it is right in front of you.
