The purpose of me writing this article today is to tell you what I never was told after the loss of a loved one so you can reflect on it.
I'm going to skip the simple 'they're in a better place now" and the "don't cry because that's not what they'd want for you." People tell you that because they use those terms in an act of sympathy. What they don't tell you is the nights where you sit down and cry because you think that you could have done something to prevent it (even in the worst situations).
You're not told that it's going to be okay or that there will be days that you can't go on with your day because the thought of moving on from your grief is normal, people just expect you to know that already.
The truth is, there is almost nothing you can do about it. Death is inevitable. It's going to happen - people die all the time. The only difference between a person and someone you know close to your heart is the connection.
Don't get me wrong, people always dwell on the death of a loved one but for a person with anxiety and depression, it's a tragedy.
The first thought is, "I could have done something to help" or "Why wasn't I there for them in their time of need?" That's normal. What you need to understand is that you will be sad, you will cry, and you will not have an easy time accepting them being gone. All you need to know is that this person loved you and they always will. Instead of the bad things (their death, illness that led to death, etc.) think about the good memories, think about the fun times you had with them and reflect on it.
At this point, you may be thinking, "It's not that easy" or "It's going to be hard." I want you to know that nothing is easy.
There will be days where you cry, there will be days that you're fine, or maybe there will be days where you don't want to leave your bed. These are all things that you may experience in order to gain acceptance. I just want you to know that you can do it and you will do it. Everyone loses someone they love or even just knew and it is hard, but life goes on.
You are not alone, but you will be okay because, eventually all the sad you have will be gone and you'll bearable to move on.
