For those of you who are not aware, Hulu recently came out with an original docu-series based on true events about Gypsy Rose Blanchard and her mother, Dee Dee. Long story short, Dee Dee told Gypsy her entire life how she was ill and couldn't walk or eat through her mouth, BUT IT WAS ALL A LIE. I won't get into specifics because you seriously just need to watch it.
Here are some thoughts I had during this week's episode: "Two Wolverines."
Honestly, at the beginning of this episode, I was kind of bored. Like, the cosplay/comic con thing they went to was a little bit of a snoozefest. I was watching her try to buy the wig like, ok give me some drama. I mean, how could I not after the tenth episode?
1. The DILF Wolverine.
Hi Honey! How is it in Wolverine Land? I don't know shit about the wolverine but I would have been pulling out all the stops if I saw him too. Gypsy did not skip a beat. All of a sudden homegirl knows how to flirt? Like oh okay, you work that shy, giggly moment. And DILF Wolverine (we later learn his name is Scott) is just playing along. Which, is kind of creepy at first because like, she could either be 12 or 19. Thank God she later tells him she's 19 because we don't need an R Kelly moment on this show.
2. Miss Gypsy Is Spilling The Tea.
I can relate to this episode in so many ways. Like, you're texting a guy you like for a little, you are flirting, things are getting spicy and you have to tell your bestie. Homegirl is inviting Lacey to her wedding, asking her to be her maid-of-honor, saying how many kids her and Scott are gonna have! Have you ever been there? I know I have. When you meet a guy at the bar and he is texting you nice things (shocking), it's pretty easy to picture yourself marrying him with four kids.
3. Cue Gypsy Having A Full Svetlana Moment.
Oh my God. I was LIVING for Gypsy just escaping her house, ditching that horrid wheelchair (hi working legs, how are ya?), throwing on a wig and calling a taxi to the ER after one simple text message. First of all, she has been told her entire life she has the brain of a seven-year-old when in reality she can call a taxi to the ER and find her mans? Sometimes I have issues just calling an UBER to the airport! And when she's walking into the ER with her fab wig just totally channeling her inner Svetlana, who else can relate? Of course, Scott was shook that she could like walk and all, but like, then he doesn't really care because he's so taken aback by her hair. And that, ladies, is the power of a wig.
4. OMG GYPSY IS GOING TO SHACK!
Holy crap!!!! First of all, this dude is drunk, AKA why his nose is all messed up, and when he is explaining why all I can think about is "How old is this man Gypsy is about to shack with?" She's technically 19 so like legal issues aside, how old would we say this Scott character is? He's got that salt and pepper look going on, but he also has a roommate. So like, broke-late-30s vibes? And he's totally just doing the bare minimum. Like drunk all the time, getting in bar fights frequently, and Gypsy just goes "You are so brave." I am crying. How many of us have been there???? The bar is legit at the floor for men these days. Like, a guy texts you back within 24 hours and you're like, "He's just so busy and he managed to text me back, he's such a hero."
5. The Makeout.
Oh. My. God. The kiss. The thing we have all been waiting for. Honestly, not even that awkward. Obviously a little weird, because hello, this is the first interaction she's had with a man! But our girl Gypsy really hangs in there moves his hand away when she's not comfortable and looks like she's enjoying herself. And he looks like he's enjoying himself too, honestly. Work! Love that! Just two consenting adults having a romantic kiss on the couch. Until her evil mom comes in and just cockblocks everyone and ends it with telling Scott she's really 14. Well, looks like that relationship is over forever.
I had so many thoughts running through my mind during this episode, it was a little difficult to consolidate them into one article and not sound like a complete lunatic. I will be shook AF until next week when we do it all again!
