The Truth About Being A Woman In Today's Society

The Truth About Being A Woman In Today's Society

"A strong woman builds others up because she knows what it's like to be torn down." - Anonymous


People don't understand how hard it actually is to be a female growing up in today's society. We are constantly worrying about the way we look if we are good enough, and so much more.

I would say that I am fairly confident in myself, strong in what I believe in, but at the same time, I am a young woman living in a society that doesn't always treat women the way they should be treated.

In fact, society has put this idea of the perfect woman in our heads. She's usually thin (like supermodel thin), tall, hourglass figure, long (often times blonde) hair, and fit. On top of that (let's be honest) unrealistic expectation, we have to dress a certain way and if we don't, it becomes a problem. If we wear clothes that are too "revealing," we are just trying to show off and get attention. If we dress too conservatively, something is wrong with us. Society has made so many guidelines that we have to follow to be considered even remotely attractive.

What about those of us that don't fit into that mold? What happens to them? What does this say about the society we live in?

As young women, we are faced with a many of a number of conflicting messages.

Some saying that we need to be academically inclined, while at the same time settle for nothing less than perfection, both in our careers and our appearances.

As a society, we value about more how someone looks than how smart they are or what they can bring to the table. So, if you're not all of those things then you're not pretty or worth anything. It's hard on an adult who fully understands that sometimes its impossible to reach those standards (although many try and some succeed) but what about a young girl who just wants to fit in? How does she live up to those expectations that are set for her before she is even old enough to understand them?

Then there is the problem of safety. From a young age, we are taught that when a boy is chasing you on the playground or says something mean to you it means they like you. What does this mean for when we are older?

Did you know that 1 in 4 women (24.3%) and 1 in 7 men (13.8%) aged 18 and older in the United States have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime? Is that what the innocence of our childhood comes to?

In terms of this type of violence against women? Mostly, we are silent. Accepting. It seems that at some point, we just decided that this is the way things are. If being a woman in today's society has taught me anything, it's important that you have someone know where you are (or be with someone) and not alone. Or at the very least, you are aware of our surroundings at all times.

For example, walking to my car around 11:30 after work the other night, I called one of my friends just so I would feel less alone and hey at least someone would know if something had happened (yeah, they were on the phone and far away and in all reality probably couldn't have done much if something had happened) but I honestly felt a bit safer knowing I wasn't technically "alone". This was something I did (that I really should not have to do) automatically to ensure safety.

Unfortunately, this is the reality of the world we live in. The best part though? We are beginning to realize what is acceptable for ourselves and not basing it off of society. It will always be in the back of our minds, but we have to start doing what is right for us.

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I'm An 18-Year-Old Female And I Will Never Be A Feminist

Honestly, I'd rather be caught dead than caught calling myself a modern-day feminist.

"A man told me to have a good day... I'm triggered." How ludicrous does that sound? Tune in because that is the extent of modern day feminism.

Sure, I think boys are stupid and that I'm probably better than 90% of the male population, but that doesn't make me a modern-day feminist. Now I believe that woman should stand up for themselves, and Golding's quote: "I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men, they are far superior and always have been," is by far one of my favorite quotes... but modern day feminism is not something I want to be associated with.

I'm all for "anything you can do I can do better," and "We can do it!" but realistically speaking in some situations, that isn't feasible. As an 18-year-old woman who works out regularly, and is stronger than the average female, I couldn't carry a 190-pound man back to a safe zone after he was shot on the front line of a war even if I tried. It is not anatomically possible for a grown woman to be as strong as a fully developed male.

Reality check: Men and women are not equal.

They are not physically equal, they are not mentally equal. Modern-day feminism is equality between the two genders, but corrupt and on steroids. I support what feminism used to be. I support women who work hard and have goals and ambition... not girls who hate men and stomp around with no shirts on to piss off the public. Feminism has developed into a polluted teaching that young men and women are plunging into.

We are built dissimilarly.

The human brain is literally an organ that is sex oriented. There is a cognitive difference, that singlehandedly destroys gender equality.

I will not spend my time running a revolution against anyone who likes Donald Trump. I am not going to binge watch Trump's twitter in an effort to start some leftist gob of drama. I refuse to be part of this head hunt to attack all Republicans on the newest Instagram post made about how feminism is stupid. I do not hate men, and society would crash and burn without the successful men and women who work together to create what we call the United States of America.

Why, you ask? Why are the 15-25 year olds of our society clinging to feminism? They are hopping on the rapidly growing bandwagon where all the hipsters, feminists and Trump haters reside. It's "cool" to hate Donald Trump. Twitter is a world of liberalism, hatred and fake love towards all. Social media is where this generation is living — and modern-day feminism brews there.

We need to keep separation in the household within roles.

We must raise our children to do what they are best at rather than trying to do something they are incapable of just to prove an irrelevant point.

Women must stand up for what they believe in and be strong in their shoes, while not getting so caught up in what your modern day feminist says she thinks is right.

We cannot let this briskly changing society sway us away from what is going to keep the world working precisely.

Cover Image Credit: Macey Joe Mullins

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Independence Should Not Take Away A Woman's Femininity

Why is it that when a woman is extremely independent, it automatically cancels out her sensitive and gentle side?


There is a running joke in my friend group about how I am the dominant person in relationships, and that I intimidate guys who are interested in me. If I am being completely honest, it is true.

I have a very strong and independent personality. I'm not a fan of people doing things for me that I feel I can do myself, like put together furniture or check the oil in my car. I ask my father to teach me how to do these things all the time, not because I plan to be single for the rest of my life, but because I don't like to depend on anyone to do things for me.

So why is it that this type of independence gets interpreted as "too manly" or unattractive? I completely understand that men are supposed to provide for and protect their families. In fact, I encourage all men to make that their goal when it comes to taking care of their family. What I don't understand is why that means women should dumb down their abilities to make the man feel superior.

Now don't get me wrong. When it comes to things like taking out the trash or changing a tire, yes, of course I would want my man to do it. All I'm saying is that it is okay for women to know how or want to do things on their own.

Another thing I notice is that women are expected to be emotional and wear our hearts on our sleeves.

That's not fair.

Anyone who knows me knows I am far from emotional. I am not a crier. I will not be in my feelings if we don't talk for a day. I don't like to talk about my personal life. I am just a very private person in general. Therefore, it is easy for me to keep my emotions out of things and not get attached to people.

These traits are too often considered "male traits." But there are plenty of women in the world who share these traits as well. It just means we need to be loved and cared for in a different way. This also means we need significant others who know how to respect, talk to, and deal with strong-minded individuals such as ourselves.

At the end of the day, everyone is different and has their own preferences and ideas. I just think strong independent women should not be stripped of their femininity because they can do a "man's job" better than a man can. Independent women need love too!

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