I strongly believe that having grown up in a house that consisted of
only my mom and I, offered me some of the greatest values, morals, and lessons
that I will ever receive in my life. Honestly, although I’m sure some people would
disagree, I consider myself extremely lucky having grown up without a father.
Watching and learning from my mom made me, now as an adult woman myself, see
things in a way that I never would have if it wasn’t only her and I. Before I
continue, I want to clarify that I am not bashing on traditional households,
nor am I insinuating that one situation is better than the other. Personally, I
wouldn’t have asked for anything to have played out differently in life. Growing
up with a single mother was the best thing to ever happen to me and I want to
share three things that I learned along the way:
Traditional does not always mean better.
I’m not going to lie, when I was growing up, sometimes it was very weird going
to a friend’s house and seeing both of their parents happily together. Having
two parents under the same roof was a completely foreign concept to me because
the situation that I was in—well, it was all I knew. A traditional household was
common and almost every kid that I knew had both of their parents raising them.
You would think that I would have been envious of them, but I never was—why? Watching
my mom, the way she did things, the way she lived, it all showed me that one
parent was enough. She went above and beyond and I never, at any point, felt
like I was missing out on something else.
Independence.
I believe that people who grow up with a single mom gain a deeply-rooted,
special type of independence. Not the type of independence where they never let
people help them with anything, rather the type where they know that if need
be, they can get through anything on their own. For me, seeing how my mom
balanced a million things by herself, gave me the determination to never give
up on anything. I don’t think she knew it at the time [I definitely didn't], but even the smallest of
things that she did on her own taught me how to trust myself. I’m never afraid
that I won’t be okay because I watched her get through everything that was ever
thrown at her by simply trusting herself to get through it.
To have self-worth.
I am fortunate enough to say that I have never struggled with self-esteem
issues. My mom taught me how to love and respect myself and to never let anyone
walk all over me. Observing the way she lived gave me the confidence to fight
for what I believe in and the courage to never be afraid to use my voice. Most
importantly, she taught me to never let anyone tell me that I am not good
enough.
I have the most beautiful relationship with my mom and I am thankful for it
every day. So yes, I do consider myself to be very lucky that I grew up with
only one parent, and no, I would never change it if I could.
Mom, thank you—you are my light.
