What is the ideal or perfect family? Yes, media has brainwashed us to believe there is such a thing as the picture perfect family but is that necessarily the correct version? There is not one correct definition or picture that can describe the perfect family. If you have two parents, you’ve lost a parent, you have another guardian or you grew up with a single parent, your definition will differ from someone else's.
Family for me growing up was just my mom, my brother and I, and for me that was perfect. Often, society chooses to be naive and believe that a single parent can’t provide for their family as well as they should. Yes, there were rough times and money was tight, but households with two parents have the same struggles. No matter what though, my mother always put my brother and I first. She has put her entire life on hold for us. My mother has had a long time relationship throughout my life and she refused to even live with him until my brother and I were both graduated from high school. Why? It’s this thing I like to call sacrifice and putting her children as her number one priority.
My mom worked her butt off to make sure my brother and I always had the nicest things we wanted. I remember her buying her first nice cell phone just to leave it home so we could call her while she was at work. Growing up with a single parent meant my older sibling got to be my round the clock babysitter when mom wasn’t home. We learned to cook a lot of things on our own at a younger age, which I personally enjoyed. My brother loved it so much he pursued it as a career and still has that dream. Sometimes life gets in the way though. My mom never held my brother or I back from anything we wanted to do, we were always allowed to go out and attempt any extracurricular we wanted, and she promised she’d get the money for it. However, other people didn’t always agree with our lifestyle. Society perceives a single parent differently, and I got to experience that first hand.
There was an occasion when I was in junior high and a teacher chose to pull me aside. I was completely caught off guard by the motion. This teacher began to question my home life. I was sick to my stomach. I will never, ever forget it. They asked me if I had a lot of food in my house, if I was satisfied with the clothes I owned, if I got to go out to eat often, and if I was happy. I was in complete shock. I was seriously mortified and embarrassed. We always had more than enough food in our house, my friends always wanted to come to my house to eat. I thought I owned nice things, the things I wanted, yeah maybe my clothes were hand-me- downs, but I loved them. I have always been genuinely happy with my home life all because I had a loving, caring, hard working mother. How that story ended you might wonder? An unhappy mother, and that’s all you need to know.
My brother and I are adults now and guess what? My mother still bends over backwards to provide for me, and she still helps my brother out. I wouldn’t trade how I grew up for anything. I have a mother I can literally tell anything to without being afraid. We are so close and so much alike that sometimes we dislike each other, but it’s normal in our family. We’ve all heard it, “don’t judge a book by its cover,” well, don’t judge a family by its appearance either. Stop, think, and perceive something strong when you see and single parent, not something weak. My mom is the strongest person I know. Thank you for raising us to be who we are today mom, we love you. Even when you drive us crazy; but that’s what you’re here for, right? To everyone out there the only thing that matters is how you perceived your family growing up. This was my version of the perfect family and I can live with that. What's yours?
