For years college students have drooled over the idea of wild parties filling their schedules every. Single. Weekend. Although going out is what some would describe as a vital part of the socialization process of college, for some students the motivation to get dressed up to go out three or four times a week just isn’t there. Here’s how to survive those weekends when your bed sounds much more appealing than a frat basement.
Always start with a group of people who feel the same way as you do, but add in a few avid partygoers to boost morale and enthusiasm. In order to maximize your time spent in stretchy sweatpants instead of constricting shorts, determine when and where you’re going before you get dressed. It’s also best to start with a solid night's sleep and a caffeine buzz to minimize chances of falling asleep on the dance floor.Although you would rather wear sweatpants to the party, your outfit should include some combination of a crop-top, too-short shorts, and lots of eyeliner. You don’t want to stick out in the crowd. You’ll also want to carry a small bag of emergency items like your cell phone, a charger (obviously), your keys, ChapStick, deodorant, mascara, whatever lipgloss you’re wearing-- actually, just bring the whole makeup bag-- a change of clothes in case your outfit rips or someone else is wearing the same thing, extra shoes in case the ones you’re wearing get ruined, a bottle of perfume, a bottle of water, some snacks, and maybe an umbrella. You never know what you’ll encounter on a night out, and party girls should to be prepared.
Make sure you save time for a full-blown photo shoot with you and your girlfriends. After all, the only point of going out is to prove to the world through endless Instagrams and Snapstories that you and your friends can have a good time. Remember to call for a ride before you start taking pictures, otherwise you’ll be stuck waiting outside your dorm in your uncomfortable outfit for hours.
While waiting for your ride, mentally prepare yourself to pile into a tiny car with 10 people over the maximum capacity. Once the car arrives, jump in and grab a seat fast-- the drivers are not afraid to peel away with someone’s legs still dangling out of the back door while their face is crushed against the shoulder of God knows who. The party will be virtually pitch black, so make sure to take advantage of the occasional flash of a strobe light as this may be your only chance to actually see who’s there. Its best to mingle; however, make sure you stick near at least a couple of your friends. When it’s time to go you do not want to be wasting precious sweatpants time elbowing your way through the crowd looking for the one friend who got away.
When going out always maintain a smile on your face. It is OK to waver from the forced smile for a few moments to belt out a few bars of a song or let out a quick, high-pitched “Woo!” The best partygoers never keep their arms by their sides, on their hips, or crossed in front of them. You want to seem open to letting loose and meeting new people, not cranky and uncomfortable (no matter how valid that may be).
In order to gain maximum fun potential, your arms must be in the air. When in doubt, look around and mimic the actions of those who look like they’re having more fun then you are. You will have no fun until you start breaking out some moves. You can stick with the basics, or if you’re feeling really bold and competitive, hop up on stage and convince everyone you’re not actually just trying to decide which show you’re going to watch when you get home.
If you don’t have a pair of black Chucks, buy them. Each party is flooded with two inches of frat sludge made up of a combination of liquids that everyone is probably better off not knowing. Your night will be an immediate disaster if your favorite pair of shoes is ruined. Yes, this means no slippers at parties either.
Once you decide you’ve had enough, book it home, fling off the damp, muddy shoes, shimmy out of your skintight outfit, and wipe off the now smeared and melted makeup. Throw on your sweatpants and XL t-shirt and treat yourself to a long-awaited Netflix binge.
Till next weekend, party scene...
