My classmates and I came to the Air Force Academy expecting to become leaders. Though we have little leadership experience of our own, we had more than five weeks to observe how upper class cadets led us during Basic Cadet Training. They made it a challenging experience, as they were supposed to do – giving us more pushups and flutter-kicks than we'd done in the entire last year, banging on our doors to wake us up at 4:30 a.m. (0430 for the “huah" ones out there), screaming at us until we forgot the nature of a normal conversation, and the list goes on. I became strong both mentally and physically by having to go through all of that, but there was one thing was made me weaker:

I forgot what God was like.

Even though most of them are not like this outside the training environment, our cadet leaders (known at the Academy as cadre) would constantly yell at us and pick apart our performance. It was meant to be that way I began to think that God was like that too. I always felt pressure to act 100 percent perfectly with no mistakes or moral compromises, and whenever I failed, I had this fear that God would punish me like my cadre. I would ceaselessly analyze every action and every thought, and if anything was out of line I would immediately get hit with a strong sense of guilt. If I got too prideful after doing well on my last military Knowledge Test, would God mess me up on the next one? Or if I made the same mistake too many times, was God mad at me?

But I forgot that God was my own Father and that he is full of love for everyone. I forgot that every time I messed up, he would immediately forgive me and encourage me to live according to my real identity. I forgot that according to Hebrews 10:14 (read it, it's awesome!) God sees me as perfect, and now I get to watch my actions catch up to me. I forgot that although God was always looking at me, it was not to critique my every flaw but simply to admire the son that he created.

That is the kind of leader I want to be. If I am to be given the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to be a cadre in Basic Training, I want my basics to always know that they are valued. I want them to know that instead of their performance shaping their identity, their awesome identity shapes their performance. I want them to know that I take pride in them as my subordinates, and if they make mistakes, they will see their maximum potential and be motivated to reach it.

With that being said, thank you so much to all of my cadre who helped guide me through basic training (go Flying Tigers Alpha!). I truly learned a lot from you and I look forward to working together as future Air Force leaders who are committed to learning more and more about the nature of true leadership.

And to any readers, please know that God has infinite love for you. He values you so much and simply wants to know you and be your Dad. If you are used to trying to validate yourself through what you do, just know that his Son Jesus did everything for you, and all you need is to believe. It will change your life, as it has changed mine.

Have a fantastic week!