The average woman in America is a size 14 to 16.
I bet I know what you’re thinking: “Great, another post about self-image and body shaming. How original.” That’s fine. But it doesn’t excuse the issue, or make it go away. Oftentimes, most of us don’t even realize we’re doing it and our own ignorance is a large contributor to this problem. No one is innocent.
I graduated high school standing at barely five feet tall and a size 14. I’d been called fat and was ridiculed behind my back. By the end of my first semester of college, I was a victim of the Freshman 15 and had reached a size 16. My weight was climbing steadily into the 200’s. It was a miserable feeling and I discovered quickly that a change had to be made. I joined a gym, cut out junk food (mostly), and watched my body transform before my eyes. Suddenly, all my clothes from high school were too big, people were taking notice of my weight loss, and I realized how much better I felt about myself. I craved this feeling to stick around. So much so, that I started pushing myself further; maybe a little too far.
They say all good things must come to an end. Eventually, I was down to a size 6, barely eating full meals, and feeling guilty about the meals I was eating. Fasted cardio became my main workout and I no longer felt good. Instead, I felt tired and bloated. The people who once told me I should get some exercise and to keep up the good work began telling me that I was going to look gross and disappear if I lost more weight. What’s a girl to do except stop pushing and let the weight come back on?
I’m not an expert on nutrition. I don’t know what it’s like to grow up a girl who is naturally thin and hear the “You’re so lucky that you can eat whatever you want and not gain weight” comments. And I can’t even begin to imagine what it’s like to ride the mental, physical, or emotional rollercoaster also known as an eating disorder (on either end of the spectrum). What I do know is that it is impossible to please every single person, no matter what you do. The average woman in America is a size 14-16. Why do we shame them? Why shame women that are a bigger size than that? Or a size 4-6? Or a 0 or a 00? We all do it. We make little comments about bellies and boobs and, my personal favorite, “Eat a cheeseburger.” I’m willing to bet that most of us have been both the victim and the perpetrator at some point in our lives.
After playing the weight fluctuation game for years, I currently stand as a size 8. I eat well but I don’t want to crumble over one slice of pizza or a donut for breakfast. I drink water, lift weights, and always eat before I hit the gym. It has taken me a lifetime to begin to appreciate the body I have and refuse to listen to people who think they know what I’ve been through to reach this point. We don’t always know someone’s struggle. Some of us are naturally thin. Some of us struggle to eat a meal while others struggle to stop binge-eating. Everyone has seen things about how “real women have curves” or that “big girls shouldn’t wear crop tops and bathing suits.” Seriously? Get out.
Body shaming is not a new issue and unfortunately, not one that will disappear anytime soon. No matter how much love there is in the world there will always be an asshole behind a keyboard who gets joy out of putting other people down. But a little consideration goes a long way. A little thought before opening your mouth to tell your skinny friend she looks like a stick with boobs or tell your curvy friend that she's "cute for a big girl" can work wonders. At the end of the day, we’re all just struggling to love ourselves, from a size 00 and up.
Don’t be the reason for someone’s struggle.
