There are few text messages that are better than the “Hey, I think I’m going to come visit you at school this weekend!” from your best friends from high school. After receiving that text, you’ll immediately get excited and go into party planning mode, you can’t have them come visit and not have a good time. You tell all your roommates and start asking, so where should we go? Should we pregame here? Should I introduce them to everyone? The list goes on and on, but you know you’re preparing for a one of a kind weekend -- after all, they’re the friends that know the real you. They’ve been there through your awkward stage, the ups and downs of your young love escapades, all the drama with high school cliques, your first…everything, and they know all of your dirty secrets from the past. You share the most memories with them, and they’re coming to make some more with your new best friends that you’ve made in college. With that being said, there is one thing that will change the events of the weekend; are they your best guy friends or your best girl friends coming? Depending on your answer there, you’ll have a very distinctive weekend ahead.
1. The Text
Girl Friends: I just got the text and I know my girl is serious -- she’s either having a rough time with something and needs an escape or coming to save me from my rough time. Usually it’ll be one best friend at a time visiting so you know you’ll have some quality gossip sessions. She usually won’t bail because we know that we’ll have a good time no matter what we do. She’s really coming for me, not so much the party we’re going to.
Guy Friends: I’m excited, but I won’t get my hopes up too high -- after all, they are guys. They’ll almost always come in multiples; they know they want to come party somewhere different, me being there is just a side note. Sure they love me, but really they’re probably more excited to scope out the bar scene and get fucked up rather than have some serious catching up conversations with me. Hopefully they’ll come, but if there’s a game on that they forgot about that night, there’s no telling if the sports bar in my hometown or my college visit will end up winning their hearts for the weekend.
2. The Planning
Girl Friends: I have to start cleaning the house, make sure I have all of my laundry done so we can pick from each others wardrobe, find out which pregame will be full of the best guys, and remember which bar has the biggest dance floor. I know we want to have a girls weekend, but we’re single, so that most definitely doesn’t mean we exclude the guys from the equation. The alcohol choice is going to be hard, but a bottle of champagne is definitely needed.
Guy Friends: Should I bother cleaning my house? Probably not, but I don’t want them to think I’m a slob. Maybe they won’t destroy it too bad. Where are we going to pregame? The guys we usually drink with probably won’t want a whole new posse of guys with no added girls, so I guess we could have it at our house and just go from there. It probably doesn’t even matter where we go after, they’ll all just be happy and fucked up. I have to make room in my fridge for beer.
3. The Meeting
Girl Friends: Hmm…I wonder if she’ll like my roommates or if my roommates will like her. I obviously picked them all as my friends for a reason, and I’m sure they’ll get along fine, girls will be girls though. I should warn her about all the guys who are off limits. And she’ll definitely love my guy friends here; they’ll probably hit on her.
Guy Friends: They’re going to hit on all of my girl friends, whatever. They’ll probably become best friends with my guy friends within seconds because they have that common ground of loving beer, and me, but beer more.
4. The Arrival
Girl Friends: We obviously run and jump into each other’s arms; it’s more like a scene from "The Notebook" than the guys’ arrival will ever be.
“This is going to be the best weekend ever, I have so much to tell you.”
There will be a nice candlelit dinner and some serious girl talk for at least two hours before you start thinking of all of the partying that’s going to take place.
Guy Friends: A simple hug and a welcome will do. Straight into my room where they’ll make jokes about who will be in my bed at the end of the night. Suddenly five beers have been shotgunned and you’re onto calling a pizza delivery for the pregame. Not much catching up, but instead a lot of embarrassing stories and memories being reminisced on.
5. The Pregame
Girl Friends: Dancing, singing, laughing, and taking a lot of pictures. I only get to see my high school bestie when we both have free time from our crazy lives, so we have to have documentation of it. Plus, look at the hot outfits we helped each other pick out!
Guy Friends: Drinking, making fun of me, and some more aggressive drinking. They’re probably going to be white girl wasted so I have to pace myself to make sure that we all get back home safely by the end of the night.
6. The Bar/Party
Girl Friends: Dancing isn’t an option, it’s a necessity. I’m sure I’ll introduce her to a few guys then run to the bathroom to get her opinions on everyone and make sure our lipstick is on point. You’re right, guys -- we don’t actually go in there just to pee. We might end up being the most drunk at the bar, but we’ll definitely be having the best time. We’re attached at the hip the entire night and will probably black out the rest of the world. We’re a power couple.
Guy Friends: Straight to the bar for some shots. Possibly introducing them to people along the way, but they’re not really going to pay attention to names anyway. The goal of their night is to blackout and maybe hook up with some easy underclassmen that I despise. We’ll laugh a lot because we’ll all be so fucked up and dancing in a circle like a little family that will end up entertaining the rest of the bar. They may act like they own the place and end up getting in a fight over some dirty looks, the bartenders won’t hesitate to spray the spray guns at unfamiliar faces starting problems but they won’t listen to me of course. If we’re at a house party, they’ll make more friends than I already have there within minutes because they just walk up to anyone and start a bro talk.
7. The Outsiders (the people who don’t know you well enough to know who these new people you’re with are)
Girl Friends: They’ll probably all come up to me at some point to say hi and then look to my girl and patiently wait until I introduce them. In my head I’ll say, "Yes, this is my hot friend that you can’t hook up with, I already warned her about you." When I meet a new person out when I’m with her though, she’ll most likely tell me to go for it no matter what. We’ll act like little school girls because of the possibility that she’s meeting someone new in my life at college at the same time as me.
Guy Friends: They’ll look from a distance and wonder, "Why is she with so many guys right now?" Misconceptions will follow, but why do I care? I’m having a great time with the only guys in my life that are a fuck boy to everyone but me. If I meet a new guy out with my guy friends though, they’re not about it. Like older brothers, they interrupt us and try to intimidate or just tell me when we leave that the guy looked like a loser. I guess they just don’t think anyone’s good enough for me.
8. The Ex Or The Enemy
Girl Friends: If my best girl is visiting and I run into my ex or a girl I hate, they’ll probably be smart enough to avoid us because they know she knows every detail of my life. She will stare into your soul or throw a drink in your face depending on the circumstance and blood alcohol level. I joke and say we’re like Nicki and Beyoncé walking into a bar, not that we look anything like them, but because we’re like a confident little gang when we’re together.
Guy Friends: They might not know it before they get there, but if they see me look upset or avoiding someone, they’ll ask me what’s up. They’ll offer their muscle if necessary, but most likely just tell me my ex was a piece of shit they never liked anyway and that that girl has nothing on me, even if she does. Thanks, bros.
9. The Afterparty
The Girl Friends: We’ll probably end up getting drunk munchies and laughing at all of the events that happened during the night or laugh at absolutely nothing. Nothing is better than the wind down into bed to get some romance-free cuddling in.
The Guy Friends: They don’t slow down, they’ll just randomly start passing out mid-conversation. Back to my house where they try keep the party going, but one or two of them will end up crashing in bed with me, and contrary to popular belief, I’ll end up having romance-free cuddles with them too.
When the weekend is over, I’ll find myself cleaning up my girl friend's makeup she left on the counter or the guys' t-shirts and cologne they forgot to pack back up. Ultimately think to myself, "Wow, I really do have the best friends in the world."
