To The Girl Who Does It All And Asks For Nothing In Return

To The Girl Who Does It All And Asks For Nothing In Return

Consider this your "thank you," even though you didn't ask for one.
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Some might call it being the “mom” friend or the “yes” girl, but it’s not always that simple. Being the girl who does it all and asks for nothing in return is more than just carrying a purse reminiscent of Mary Poppins’ carpet bag or always saying yes to late night food runs. For me, it comes from lack of a dependable childhood friend, or any friends really. Simply put, I became the friend that I desperately wanted for years. I learned a lot about being a friend when I myself was alone. Although I’m fully aware that I don’t ask for anything in return and that’s my fault, however, I know that I’m not the only one who suffers from being insanely dependable.

In a work environment, you're always picking up shifts, but when the roles are reversed, you struggle to get your shifts covered.

This is what I call a working girl’s version of the saying “Always the bridesmaid, never the bride.” At work, you’re the person who’s always offering to take your coworker’s shifts, but when you need one of your shifts covered, not a single person offers *crickets chirp*. Of course, you don’t mind being someone that your coworkers can depend on, but you wish that there was someone that you could depend on too.

When it comes to family, you’re the shoulder everyone leans on.

No matter how far away you are, you still somehow end up being involved in the family conflict. Whether it’s your sibling calling to complain about your parents or vice versa, you always lend a listening ear.

Even though sometimes you just want to say that it’s not your place to get involved, you give your input when needed. Despite the fact that sometimes it feels as if people have forgotten that you too have a life of your own, you often choose not to share it because you don’t want to be a burden on someone else.

With your significant other, you’re the first person they call to ask for advice.

While I absolutely love being able to be there for my boyfriend, it is hard knowing that when I need someone to go to, all he can do is listen. I absolutely adore my boyfriend, but when it comes to needing advice, he is by no means my first choice. While some guys are awesome at giving advice, he’s very simple when it comes to solving problems -- if there’s a problem, fix it.

He also grew up having older siblings, so he’s very unfamiliar with conflicts between siblings. Despite the fact that any time he has a problem with his friends, he knows that I’m only one phone call away, I know that all he can be for me is a listening ear (which he’s great at).

No matter how ridiculous it might seem, your friends know that you’re always there just in case they need you.

No matter what time of day it is, your friends know that they can depend on you to be there for them in the event that they need you. Whether it be being the designated driver or just walking to their car that’s a mile away in the freshman lot, they know that if they need you, you’ll come without question. While this role can be exhausting, you wouldn’t trade it for the world because deep down it feels so good to be needed. If your best friend is having issues with f*ckboys, she knows that all she has to do is text you a gif and you’ll respond within seconds (even if it’s 3 a.m.)

To tell you the unfiltered truth, being the girl who does it all and asks for nothing in return is hard. Sometimes you question if it’s worth caring this much when you yourself have nobody to go to. However, if you are this person, you should know that you’re not alone and that you are appreciated. So continue being the coworker who takes every called-off shift, keep answering every phone call from your mom, listen to your significant-other ramble on about how his friends canceled on him yet again, and don’t stop doing little favors for your friends.

The truth is, the world needs more of those who do good and ask for nothing in return. While doing small favors for your friends or answering your mom's calls don’t seem very impactful, the little things can be. If you didn’t do it all, then who would? Of course, there’s always the possibility that someone else would fill the void, but who’s to say so? Think about the friend that you wish you had when you were all alone. Would you really want someone to feel alone like that? Although sometimes you wish that someone was there to listen to you, you still don’t regret being there for everyone, because you know that everyone needs a someone like you.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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A Letter To My Best Friend On Valentine's Day

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To my beautiful best friend,

Warning: This letter is about to get extremely cheesy. I am talking four cheese lasagna cheesy. But no one deserves a love letter like this more than you do.

This Valentine’s Day, I want to express my love for you. On this wondrous occasion with which most people express their love to their significant other, I want to tell you, my best friend, how much I cherish our friendship.

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You are the ultimate love of my life. Boys have come and gone but you remain a constant; for that I am grateful. You have been there for me when my family could not be; for that I am grateful. You have been my backbone, my rock, and all those other clichés people use to describe the people they care about, and yet you have been so much more than that as well; for that I am grateful.

All my love this Valentine’s Day goes out to you, my friend, because you do not receive it enough. You have picked me up out of the dirt, brushed me off, and kissed my wounds more times than I can count, and I will never be able to thank you enough for that, but I am sure am going to try.

Thank you for the midnight cries. Thank you for the midnight laughs. Thank you for ordering way too much food with me and still just eating it all. Thank you for the advice, both solicited and unsolicited. Thank you for telling me what I need to hear, even when it isn’t what I want to hear. Thank you for the silly pictures. Thank you for the stupid inside jokes. Thank you for making bad decisions with me. Thank you for laughing with me and laughing at me. Thank you for the endless memories.

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More than anything, I want you to know that I love you. I love you. You are the family I get to choose, the one I go to when I have nowhere else to turn. You are the one I know I can always run to, whether we saw each other yesterday or haven’t seen each other in a year. You have played a part in molding who I am as a person, and I am so grateful for having such an amazing person affecting my life in such a positive way.

With all the love in my heart,

Your friend
Cover Image Credit: https://www.facebook.com/natalie.pederson.5/photos

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A Letter to my Best Friends that go to the Rival School

It's a love hate relationship..

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To my Indiana University Hoosiers,

The concept of rivalry is something that we are taught from a very young age. You're not supposed to like your opponent. You're supposed to despise them with every ounce of your being. When it comes to competition, we're taught that our ultimate goal is to come out on top and in order to reach the goal of winning. We can't subject ourselves to the weakness of friendships with the enemies. In my own life, I've been taught that the IU vs. Purdue rivalry has a certain level of importance. I was born a boilermaker and I followed in the footsteps of my great-grandparents, grandparents, uncles, and parents by deciding to become an official boilermaker last fall. I've had the hatred for IU implanted into my brain and ever since I was young I knew that IU was the enemy.

So how do I have such good friends who go to the rivalry school? Do I have a secret level of hate for the ones who are closest to me?

The truth is, I don't. Do I hate your stupid "cream and crimson" candy-striped pants? Of course. Do I hate the fact that people are always claiming that your school is the Indiana school for basketball even though Purdue has consistently beat IU since Cody Zeller left? You bet I do. Do I hate the fact that you're always bragging about your banners? No doubt. I hate everything about your school.

But do I don't even hate you to the slightest bit.

The truth is, you guys are the best friends I have ever had. You look out for me. You care about me and always make sure I'm okay. You tease me like siblings. You allow me to be my very best self. I love the times we spend together because I'm always on the flooring dying from laughter. There's no rivalry on earth that could make me not want to spend the weekends with you guys, staying up until 1 am and going to Mcdonald's or laughing about stupid inside jokes. You have shaped into being a better person and you have allowed me to enjoy every single moment of life. I don't know where I would be without you guys and our friendship. Without you guys, I would be incomplete.

All the time I think about the things I am going to tell my kids about when they ask me to tell them stories about when I was younger and when I am living out moments with you guys, I know that these are the stories that I'm going to tell them about. I'm going to tell them about all the fun times we've spent at both of our schools. I'm going to tell them about the amazing friendship that we all shared and the amazing friendship I hope they find someday in their own lives.

One day, I'll teach my kids all about the pride of being a boilermaker. I'll tell them about the amazing energy you feel as you walk into Mackey Arena. I'll teach them to sing "Hail Purdue" as soon as they can even speak. I'll tell them about the amazing fountain runs that they can do on campus. I'll tell them everything they need to love about Purdue. I'll even tell them to hate IU.

But you know what else I'll tell them?

Some people are worth crossing enemy lines for.

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