Mother's Day is just around the corner, so you know what that means! It's time to look under your couch and in your car for some change and get a gift! If you don't have any money, remember that it's the thought that counts, but you still need to get something, so put a lot of thought into it. Enough thought to produce something from thin air. If you can do that, please talk to me, because that's amazing.

Mother's Day can be stressful, so to lessen the load of what amazing gift to get, I have created a list of fool-proof ideas that will surely knock the socks off of your mother. And if you would rather celebrate your father, another family member, a friend, or even yourself on this day, this list still works! Heck, you can even buy me a gift!

1. "Lemonade"

You can make your own lemonade, or you can buy the visual album by Muva Knowles (aka Queen Bey). Why? Because it's bomb as hell, and you know you need your mother to be with the times.

2. Flowers

Everyone deserves flowers once in awhile, even your mother! Fake flowers last longer, but they may send the message that she's really not worth real flowers. You should get both types just in case. And a vase.

3. A Vase

At this point you've probably decided that choosing between real and fake flowers is too difficult, so rather than stress yourself out, you've come to the conclusion that she can buy her own flowers, and instead you will provide the vase. That will work, right?

4. Water

Need some watuh fuh dem flowahs, nam sayin'?

5. A Man

Now, I know what you're thinking. "But Jeff, isn't this just perpetuating the idea that women need men in this patriarchal, misogynistic, and heteronormative society? Should we even say that my mother 'needs' anyone to make her whole? What if she's not interested in men? Or women? Or people? What if she isn't even a she, but rather a he? Or someone who doesn't confirm to the gender binary?" And to that I say, "You're right! Just forget this one."

6. Lunch

As young people, we know that free food is a gift from the heavens. This never changes. Remember that.

7. A Coffin

'Cause she slay, and she needs a place to put the bodies.

8. "Lemonade"

You know, that new Beyonce album? It's bomb as hell and... wait, I already said this. Damn.

9. Wine

After she's been raising you, she's going to need about 30 barrels of this. Or some vodka.

10. A Crown

'Cause she's flawless. And, if you can, a rightful kingdom.

Mother's Day is a day when we celebrate the person who raised us. Whether that be your mother, your father, your grandparents, your sister, brother, friend, or neighbor, you need to take a moment to recognize that person and thank them. You can even take time to thank yourself, and recognize the strength needed to get where you are. It's a day to spread some love, so go spread it!