Let's Start Getting to Know People Instead Of Judging Them
Start writing a post

Judging Is Easy, Getting To Know Someone Is Harder

If we can read a book without judging the cover, we can do it with people.

Judging Is Easy, Getting To Know Someone Is Harder
Lauryn Heppe

Let me write you a scenario.

You go to your local grocery store on Saturday morning. You find it is extremely busy. You walk up and down the aisles to find food to eat for the week. You grab the standards – cereal, chips, juice, etc. As you walk down the dairy aisle, you see a woman. That woman looks to be 35 years old, and she's wearing a crop top, high waisted ripped shorts, and hot pink Crocs. Her hair is purple and her nails are neon green. She's also talking on an indestructible, 15-year-old Nokia phone.

What is your first thought?

"What person leaves the house like that?"

"Who talks on a phone like that? She must be out of date."

"What 30-year-old has the indecency of wearing such an immodest outfit?"

Yes, this person I described looks a little out of place for the grocery store. But here's what I didn't say about her:

The crop top and high waisted shorts are the only clothes not in the laundry. She had been working 60 hours a week for two weeks and hasn't had enough energy to do her laundry. She's tired. She wore her crocs because her feet hurt from running around the office all week. Her hair is purple because her niece struggles from severe depression, and she wanted to support her. Her nails are neon green because she wanted to make her kids laugh, despite never seeing them because she works. Her Nokia phone? Oh, she carries that around when she misses her mom. The last voicemail she got from her was on that phone, and she gets to hear the words, "I love you more than life," another time.

This woman I described has a backstory that very few people know about. No stranger can understand why she looks like that. She just wants to get her groceries and go home. Her appearance may not say that, but that's the truth. People easily say, "She doesn't look normal."

Why are we so quick to judge?

It's because it's much easier. It's much easier to say, "That's a weird thing to do." It's much easier than figuring out why someone dresses the way they do. It's much easier to point the finger and say, "What you do is weird," and walk away.

Judgment is part of human nature. We can't always control our immediate thoughts about someone. I'm not suggesting that you shouldn't have a first impression of someone. If someone is smoking drugs outside a movie theater, then your conscience telling you to stay clear of the area is probably a good, reasonable judgment. However, that judgment can go south. That initial thought, "stay clear for your own protection," can turn into, "that guy is garbage because he smokes drugs."

What you perceive to be the truth is usually far from it.

Use your judgment wisely. Use your initial reaction to make a safety call, but don't talk nasty about someone you've just met or hardly know based on how they look or what they do. I'm no saint when it comes to judging people, but I've learned throughout the years that you should never judge a person by their cover.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

20 Things I Learned By The Start of My 20s

No one expects you to have your life together by the time you're 20, because honestly, they didn't either.

Allyson Foutty

We are all often faced with many life challenges throughout the time leading up to our 20s. Before this time, and throughout it, we often look back at the things we've learned and how they've influenced who we are as people today. Some of my biggest influences were some of the challenges I've faced, but they've taught me 20 important things by the start of my 20s.

Keep Reading... Show less

The Boyfriend Recipe

The ingredients to build a relationship are a little more complicated than just a bouquet of flowers and a box of candy.


Relationships. Long distance or not, significant others are much more than just that. I would be lying if I said I did not love the sweet gestures that only a boyfriend can give. The flowers, funny phone calls, hand holding, breakfast dates, and tight hugs are special but my relationship and many others out there exist on much more than just these little gestures. It is a tricky concoction that consists of one part boyfriend and two parts best friend and would not work without one part or the other. While having a relationship may not be quite as easy as baking a batch of cookies, it has its own recipe (with a few variations for flavor) to follow for a good match.

Keep Reading... Show less
google images

Fashion just keeps growing and changing and old trends are made new! Now, I'm no beauty guru, just a beauty guru wannabe, but personally I have compiled some stylish wardrobe must haves! These can be cute assets to go back to school or just to catch up on some of the latest trends...

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

There's More To A Relationship Than Netflix

Summertime is only 93 days of the year, Find something to do!

Tallie Ammar

Summertime is ideal for more than just hanging out and binging your favorite TV series with your friends. Although summer does bring rain and thunderstorms which is perfect for those binging days, take advantage of those nice and sunny days. There is so many opportunities to get out of the house and enjoy the season before the snow starts to come back. Here are 25 interesting dates that are doable almost anywhere for any age.

Keep Reading... Show less
Leilani Encarnacion

Philadelphia has its beauty, but some of you may have not been to some of the most beautiful hidden spots in the city. This summer is a chance for new adventures and exploring, so here are a few places that I highly recommend you should visit at least once.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments