My friends and family know I'm openly pansexual. Basically meaning that I like men, women, and non-binary genders (i.e. transgender). For many years now, I've had a sneaking suspicion that I'm gender fluid. For those who don't know, it means I feel like a mix of male and female. I may feel more boy some days, and more girl other days, and even neither/both occasionally. For gender fluidity, it's not set in stone; anyone can be on any part of the gender spectrum. Everyone identifies differently throughout the LGBT+ community, and it's so amazing! I highly recommend you watch Ruby Rose's 'Break Free' video for a great visual explanation:
When I was a child, I always played video games and dolls. It really just depended on my mood that day. Hell, I even used to wear Disney princess outfits to the grocery store. In middle school, I dressed more masculine and wore lots of baggy hoodies and shirts. Most of the time I shopped in the men's section at Goodwill, but I would go to the women's clothes too. In the seventh grade, I started to realise that I like girls. I started to get a crush on someone, so I came out as bi-sexual. I lived in a very rural area, where some people didn't accept those differences. I was picked on and judged by many, but thankfully my close friends accepted me. Art, love and music helped me accept who I am. The song, "Rebel Rebel," by David Bowie really helped me embrace myself when I was younger.
Over the years, I started wearing both masculine and feminine clothes. Recently, I've been trying to make myself look more like a man. In private, I have been contouring my cheeks and jawline to appear more narrow. As much as I have accepted my sexuality over the years, I'm still not quite satisfied with my body. At times, I don't like my breasts and I want to flatten them. I have considered buying a chest binder from gc2b (http://gc2b.myshopify.com/). I feel more comfortable when I can go from male to female; it makes me feel more comfortable and like myself. I don't really like labels, but I guess I am genderfluid.
Thankfully, society is pretty accepting of the LGBT+ community, so it's a lot easier to be myself. As a teen, I wasn't so comfortable in my skin; honestly, probably for most of my young adult life too. Now, I am proud of myself for not being afraid to show my true colors. All I want out of life is to express myself, be creative and love my friends and family. Love whoever you want, be male or female, but more importantly, just be happy with who you are!
