During this past weekend's season premiere of the most loved/hated show on television, GoT nation was instantly reminded that the raunchiness, violence and suspense never ceases to surprise us. Almost all of our main characters' plot lines were followed up on, so thank you, creators, but this left little room for the multiple big-shock-factors per episode that GoT is famous for.
To start off, we're brought back to The Wall where we left off in the season 5 finale, looking at a dead Jon Snow lying in the snow at Castle Black after he was betrayed and murdered by some of his own brothers of the Night's Watch.
He's then found by Ser Davos and some loyal members of The Watch, who bring his body to a private chamber where they start to discuss their plans for revenge.
Of course we're all anxiously awaiting the "if and how" of Jon's hopeful return the whole episode, but no such luck, because why would the creators ever just tell us what we're dying to know...
Next, we're back in Winterfell with who might possibly be the worst family in the series thus far, the Boltons – still being the WOAT. So no one cares about the Boltons, but they are searching for Lady Sansa Stark and Theon (Reek) Greyjoy who we do care about.
Flash to the next scene of Sansa and Theon running through the woods away from Winterfell and towards the North. Which brings us to our first epic fight scene of the episode. Ramsay Bolton's "best men" find the two escaping, but are sh*t out of luck when Lady Brienne of Tarth and her temporary sidekick, Podrick, step up on scene and take charge. Look who's about to be the new favorite foursome.
Then, we're back in King's Landing where Jaime is supposed to be arriving from Dorne with his and Cersei's daughter, who was poisoned in the season 5 finale. So not a great surprise for Cersei, who's had a bit of a rough go recently. The poor Queen – can't catch a break. But you know some serious ass-whooping revenge is about to go down.
Margaery is still in the High Sparrow's jail... #yawn
Daenerys is essentially enslaved by the Dothraki once again, but then ever-so-kindly reminds them that she's frickin Khaleesi, Mother of Dragons and widow of Khal Drogo. But she's rudely awakened to the reality that all Khal widows have to live in this compound together, so that's not ideal. Really, I'm not that worried though. There are some sturdy men and dragons out looking for her (in theory).
Arya... What can we do to help you?? You may be blind, homeless and hungry but come on, you're better than this! Use your senses and HIT HER BACK!
And finally, what in the seven hells did I just watch with Melisandre in the end of the episode and what does that make her? Really, as long as she can bring back Jon Snow I guess it doesn't matter, but, seriously I'm going to have nightmares.
Until next week, GoT nation. Winter is coming.
