It's exactly 6 a.m. on a Friday, as I sit at the edge of my bed writing.

Ever since a very young age, I've known that I've wanted to do something of the creative variety. Whether that be write or draw or paint (I can't paint) or play an instrument (not mayonnaise (cheap joke)) or direct, I've always been confident in the fact that I want to create stuff.

I spent all of last night laying awake in bed wondering, "how do I go about creating?" The result was a mixture of different emotions and feelings like confusion, which led to frustration, which led to anger, which led to sadness, which led to defeat. Wash, rinse and repeat.

Every time I meet someone important or famous or both, I try to ask them for advice on embarking on a creative career. The answer is usually the same: "Create."

For the most part, this is great advice. What better way to learn your craft than by doing it over and over again? Practice is where we learn to find our creative voice, and it usually takes quite some time before we can learn to listen to it.

I know that creative careers take years and years for them to finally take off. I know that there is no such thing as overnight success (and I probably wouldn't be interested in it, either). So, I think what I'm really feeling at 6:14 am on a Friday is fear.

My biggest fear in life is creating as an activity. Something I do on the side to keep myself busy.

I'm terrified that I won't be able to create all the time, that I won't be able to make a living doing what makes my life worth living.

That last part sounds drastic, but I've sat here for four minutes thinking about it, and I still haven't deleted it.

There is literally. nothing. on. earth. I'd. rather. do. than. create. period. exclamation point.

I appreciate the advice. I'll continue to create. As often as I can. But my new question is this: "What's next?"