From A Hopeless Romantic Millennial...

From A Hopeless Romantic Millennial...

Longing to be appreciated beyond your iPhone screen? I sympathize.

Being a hopeless romantic in this generation is really a special kind of Hell. Are you a woman that longs for more than a #WCW post in a generation that values likes and shares over everything? (Don't get me wrong, an occasional #WCW post is nice, too)

A woman longing to live in the moment, not a 'my-story'? (Yes, we love to be shown off.. But we love even more so to be appreciated beyond the ever changing world of Social Media..)

A woman longing to be cared for as deeply as she cares for her significant other?

Don't worry, I sympathize.

How do you deal with it when you have so much love to give, but no man seems to appreciate it? You're constantly giving every bit of yourself and then some, all for it to be thrown back in your face?

You have to get to the point where you value yourself. That's how you deal with it. You have to get to the point where you know what you bring to your relationship, and you don't look for someone who loves that about you, you finally love it about yourself.

You love that you care so deeply about your significant other their heartbreak becomes yours. You do your best every single day to protect their heart from being broken, but sometimes no matter how hard you try, it breaks into a million pieces. Yet, no matter how bad you may be at puzzles, you will put those pieces back together time and time again.

You love that you would do anything and everything to make your significant other happy. Their laugh is your favorite song and their smile your favorite movie.

You love that you are so passionate about love and life and all it has to offer; and you long for the day you can share that passion with someone who appreciates it the way you do.

You can't be shy about it anymore.

You can't question if it's something wrong with you. It's nothing wrong with you, if the potential suitors in your life don't appreciate these things about you, they're not the right one. I know thats a cliche we get tired of hearing, but it's true.

There is a man out there with a passion for love and life ready to love you as Jesus loved the church.

There is a man who will see not only all the positives that you bring to a relationship, but qualities you didn't even know you had; because he'll bring out the best in you, not the worst.

He will never leave you questioning his feelings or his intentions. He will never leave you feeling guilty for, well, having feelings. He will never make you compare yourself to another woman. He will build you up, not tear you down.

There is a man out there longing to give himself to a woman who will appreciate him as much as he appreciates her, and God will cross your paths when it's your time.

In the meantime, I know with every heart break it becomes harder to remain positive, but don't lose faith.

And please, don't ever let a man ruin your self image.

You are beautiful and you are worthy of a love so deep the ocean would be jealous.

Until you and your future husband cross paths, remember love doesn't only lie in a significant other, but in different forms all around us.

In our family, our friends, our pets, even polite strangers on the street.

God shows us his love every day.

And more often than not, we lose sight of that love; because we're so focused on what we believe we're missing. When in reality, it's been right in front of us all along.

We are spoiled by God's infinite love, we're just waiting for the right person to share it with.

Cover Image Credit: My Bligr

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Relationship Abuse: Getting Caught Up In Making Someone Else Happy That You Forget About Your Own Happiness

Keep fighting for your sanity

Over the past few weeks I’ve had some major changes take place in my life. I’ve moved from Connecticut back to my home state of Georgia. I’ve ended a horrible relationship and the sad part is; I don’t even miss him. Yes, there were a few tears, but they weren’t sad ones. More like tears of utter joy and freedom.

So, my question to you is: when do you know that it’s time to break up? When is enough, enough?

Just a little run down on my past relationship to fill you so I can be justified in my decision to part ways. I spent the most of my time caring for the other person and trying to make their life perfect. I didn’t complain because Lord knows he did enough of that for the both of us.

My time, energy, and emotions were constantly spent trying to be everything that I possibly could for him and, yet I constantly asked myself if it was enough. I got so caught up in trying to make someone else happy that I completely lost sight of my true happiness.

I suffered in silence most of the time except when I had met my mental capacity for the bullshit. I put myself in counseling because I needed the time to just get it all out. I needed someone to vent my frustrations to. I would leave my sessions feeling drained and just spent from all the emotions that would come out.

My cellphone was a tracking device. I couldn’t be gone an hour without that all too familiar call of ‘where are you? When will you be back?’

It drove me to the point of madness, not like crazy madness. Just that state of mind. I was irritable and always in a horrible mood. I felt trapped and smothered. I know that a committed relationship is a big step.

Living together is a must but then it comes to the point when you suffer emotionally from the strain that the relationship puts on you I think it’s time to walk away. But the person I lived with didn’t want to take me for my word that I was unhappy and wanted a break. So, what was I to do?

How was I supposed to make them see? What was it going to take?

When I decided that I had finally had enough I did the only thing I could do. I booked a flight back to Georgia and decided that was where I was going to stay. Even after saying that I was done, just finished and couldn’t take anymore he still called trying to change my mind. ‘I’ll change, I’ll be better.’

I still couldn’t deal with the fact that he simply wasn’t hearing me. I mean how many ways can a person say that they need space before the other person gets the hint?

And of course, I was made out to be the bad one. I was causing him pain and I didn’t care about him. That’s all he ever cared about; his well-being. If I was unhappy it was ok because it didn’t affect him, and my problems were mine to work through on my own. There was no US unless HE was happy.

Every friend I talked to told me the same thing. Get out and walk away!

So, would you? Would you leave a relationship after you’ve tried talking to the person and explaining your unhappiness and they still wouldn’t listen?

Would you feel better after suffering months of mental and emotional abuse to finally walk out and gain back your freedom and sense of self-worth?

I suffered from relationship abuse, don’t let the same thing happen to you. If you’re fighting for your sanity and trying to keep yourself from going crazy; take my advice and leave while you can. Don’t stay trapped.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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It's Hard To Accept The Apology He Never Gave You

Even though you deserve for him to be sorry, it's OK if he's not.

One of the hardest things to do is find a way to move on without closure. It’s picking yourself up without ever understanding why everything became a mess in the first place.

It’s drowning in sorrows, soaking up all the pain and watching your self-worth dwindle away while you wait for the apology that is never going to come.

The thing is, sometimes you really do deserve an apology.

A person’s inability to acknowledge how they mistreated you is not a reflection of you as a person. He spun you in circles, drowned your heart in confusion and left you dizzy and broken.

But even though you deserve for him to be sorry, and you deserve for him to say it, you absolutely do not need it.

Somewhere along the way, someone convinced you that the only way to have closure was to have one last, heartfelt conversation with him. You just want some explanation as to why he was tearing you apart.

But let me ask you this, does that really make it better?

Is being destroyed in person better than through a text? Is that last conversation going to mend all the broken pieces you’re left with in the end?

He was unfair. He was wrong. He should be sorry.

But it’s OK if he's not.

Just because you deserve better, doesn’t mean what you once had didn’t mean something. Things that broke along the way do not remove your value, nor what that man once meant to you.

You’ve allowed this to define you and strip you of your self-worth. You’ve allowed yourself to believe that you cannot move forward without receiving some sort of validation for what happened.

Well here is your validation:


You don’t need him to say he’s sorry. You don’t need him to miss you. You don’t need him to regret the situation.

You are more than enough.

You are valid in your feelings and your frustration. You are valid in your want for closure and for a genuine apology.

I am sorry it has come to this. I am sorry you are heartbroken.

But as far as moving on, you’ve got this.

You are OK, and even if you’re not, it’s OK to not be OK. Closure is just accepting that a situation is over and finding a way to move on.

Accept that you deserve an apology. That’s all you really need. You deserve it. You are worth it. You are absolutely amazing on your own.

So pick yourself up, and fly.

You’ve got this.

Cover Image Credit: 123rf

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