The JMU FROG Week Survival Kit, From A To Z

The JMU FROG Week Survival Kit, From A To Z

Everything you need to survive the last week of freedom before classes!


The end of August typically means that classes are about to start back up for a brand-spankin' new school year. But for JMU students, it has a slightly more significant meaning: FROG. WEEK. For people new to this, it's the final week before classes when the Dukes crawl back into Harrisonburg to spend all day at the pools and all night at your frat of choice. It's truly a beautiful thing to look out at a sea of inebriated college kids scream-singing "Mr. Brightside."

As we move into this sacred week, I've taken the liberty to create an A-Z survival kit for all you kiddos as you put on your bikinis and slap on sunscreen to hit the pools. Take notes and have fun!

A is for Advil

Make sure you have a stock of Advil ready to go. You'll be rising and grinding every morning and you're gonna need something to ease last night's hangover!

B is for Booze

Duh. That's an obvious one.

C is for chasers

Also another obvious one. Unless you're savage and you don't need a chaser. I recommend lemonade or Dr. Pepper but it really depends on your poison of choice.

D is for Drug Detection

In the craziness of FROG Week, it's important to remember that there are still sleaze bags that will try to drug your drink. Think your drink was roofied? Amazon sells Date Rape Drug Detection Tests for $12.49. It's better to be safe than sorry, Dukes!

E is for Exit

Ya know... for when the cops show up and the party gets busted? Yeah, make sure you have an exit plan and all your exit buddies.

F is for Friends!

Madelene Whitfield

FROG Week is nothing without friends! Get your squad together, crack open some cold ones and enjoy your last week of freedom!

G is for GrubHub

For all your Drunchie/Munchie needs, GrubHub is your go-to food delivery site that will cure any hangover.

H is for Hype

Gotta get hyped for FROG Week! That's the only emotion there is for this week.

I is for Ices

Take a knee and chug an ice for FROG Week! It's time to stockpile on Smirnoff Ices and ice everyone in sight.

J is for Jungle Juice

If you're planning on drinking the juice, go back up and re-read the letter D.

K is for Kissing

There'll be a lot of random make-outs so just be prepared for that!

L is for latex

I don't think I need to explain this one... use protection and stay safe.

M is for music

Only the more fire songs for FROG Week! Blast that music loud!

N is for nap time

You will have to recharge between the pool and the frat so make sure you make time for a nap! You'll feel a lot better if you do!

O is for outfits

Pick out your cutest outfits to go to the trashiest frat!

P is for phone

Yo Dukes! Before you hit the pools, make sure you have your phone on you! Gotta make sure you can call a sober ride and document all your drunk shananagins.

Q is for Quality and Quantity

This one is up for interpretation.

R is for the Retreat

Where everyone will be hanging out during the day, no doubt.

S is for shotgunning

A timeless way to chug a beer. If you don't know how you should probably learn ASAP!

1. Make a hole towards the bottom of the beer (you can use a key, a knife, your teeth, anything sharp)

2. Pop open the top of the can

3. Tilt and chug from the hole

And that's how you shotgun! Go Dukes!

T is for Tallboys

What you will probably be drinking at some point during the week.

U is for Uber

If you haven't already, download the Uber app. Trust. Me. I guarantee that you will use it at least once this week.

V is for Vape

Dude, we get it. You vape.

W is for water

Make sure that you stay hydrated with WATER this week! It's super important so you don't pass out or get sick! #HydrateOrDiedrate

X is for who are we kidding, nothing starts with X

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Still have fun and stay safe!

Y is for YOLO

Madelene Whitfield

This motto stands true for FROG Week. You really only live once so go cray!

Z is for Z-Pack

For a swift recovery, before classes begin, stock up on Z-packs because believe me, you'll probably need it after all the madness of FROG Week.

(Sing in the tune of the Alphabet Song) Now we know our ABC's, time for the Dukes to get rowdy!

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35 Major Life Facts According To Nick Miller

"All booze is good booze, unless it's weak booze."

Fact: If you watch "New Girl," you love Nick Miller.

You can't help it. He's an adorable, lovable mess of a man and you look forward to seeing him and his shenanigans each week. While living the infamous and incomparable life of Nick Miller, and obviously Julius Pepperwood— he has learned many valuable laws of the land. And, although Nick refuses to learn anything from anyone besides his mysterious, old Asian friend Tran, he does have a few lessons he'd like to teach us.

Here are 35 facts of life according to 'Nick Milla Nick Milla':

1. Drinking keeps you healthy.

"I'm not gonna get sick. No germ can live in a body that is 65% beer."

2. Dinosaurs never existed.

"I don't believe dinosaurs existed. I've seen the science. I don't believe it."

3. A paper bag is a bank.

"A bank is just a paper bag but with fancier walls."

4. Having sex is similar to delivering mail.

"I'm like a mailman, except instead of mail it's hot sex that I deliver."

5. Moonwalking is a foolproof way to get out of any awkward situation.

Jess (about Nick): "Now he won't even talk to me. I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me. He does that sometimes."

6. Using a movie reference is also a great way.

Cece: "Come on, get up!"

Nick: "No, I don't dance. I'm from that town in "Footloose."

7. There's no reason to wash towels.

Nick: "I don’t wash the towel. The towel washes me. Who washes a towel?"

Schmidt: "You never wash your towel?"

Nick: "What am I gonna do? Wash the shower next? Wash a bar of soap?"

8. Exes are meant to be avoided at all costs (especially if/unless they're Caroline)

"I don't deal with exes, they're part of the past. You burn them swiftly and you give their ashes to Poseidon."

9. IKEA furniture is not as intimidating as it looks.

"I'm building you the dresser. I love this stuff. It's like high-stakes LEGOs."

10. You don't need forks if you have hands.

Jess: "That's gross. Get a fork, man."

Nick: "I got two perfectly good forks at the end of my arms!"

11. Sex has a very specific definition.

"It's not sex until you put the straw in the coconut."

12. Doors are frustrating.

"I will push if I want to push! Come on! I hate doors!"

13. All booze is good booze.

"Can I get an alcohol?"

14. ...unless it's weak booze.

"Schmidt, that is melon flavored liquor! That is 4-proof! That is safe to drink while you're pregnant!"

15. Writers are like pregnant women.

Jess: "You know what that sound is? It's the sound of an empty uterus."

Nick: "I can top that easily. I'm having a hard time with my zombie novel."

Jess: "Are you really comparing a zombie novel to my ability to create life?"

Nick: "I'm a writer, Jess. We create life."

16. All bets must be honored.

"There is something serious I have to tell you about the future. The name of my first-born child needs to be Reginald VelJohnson. I lost a bet to Schmidt."

17. Adele's voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.

"Adele is amazing."

18. Beyoncé is extremely trustworthy.

"I'd trust Beyoncé with my life. We be all night."

19. Fish, on the other hand, are not.

“Absolutely not. You know I don’t trust fish! They breathe water. That's crazy!"

20. Bar mitzvahs are terrifying.

Schmidt: "It's a bar mitzvah!"

Nick: "I am NOT watching a kid get circumcised!"

21. are blueberries.

Jess: "So far, Nick Miller's list of fears is sharks, tap water, real relationships..."

Nick: "And blueberries."

22. Take your time with difficult decisions. Don't be rash.

Jess: "You care about your burritos more than my children, Nick?"

Nick: "You're putting me in a tough spot!"

23. Getting into shape is not easy.

"I mean, I’m not doing squats or anything. I’m trying to eat less donuts."

24. We aren't meant to talk about our feelings.

"If we needed to talk about feelings, they would be called talkings."

25. We're all a little bit too hard on ourselves.

"The enemy is the inner me."

26. Freezing your underwear is a good way to cool off.

"Trust me, I'm wearing frozen underpants right now and I feel amazing. I'm gonna grab some old underpants and put a pair into the freezer for each of you."

27. Public nudity is normal.

"Everbody has been flashed countless times."

28. Alcohol is a cure-all.

"You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound with drinking alcohol."

29. Horses are aliens.

"I believe horses are from outer-space."

30. Turtles should actually be called 'shell-beavers.'

Jess: "He calls turtles 'shell-beavers."

Nick: "Well, that's what they should be called."

31. Trench coats are hot.

"This coat has clean lines and pockets that don't quit, and it has room for your hips. And, when I wear it, I feel hot to trot!"

32. Sparkles are too.

"Now, my final bit of advice, and don't get sensitive on this, but you've got to change that top it's terrible and you've got to throw sparkles on. Sparkles are in. SPARKLES ARE IN."

33. Introspection can lead to a deeper knowing of oneself.

"I'm not convinced I know how to read. I've just memorized a lot of words."

34. It's important to live in the moment.

"I know this isn't gonna end well but the middle part is gonna be awesome."

35. Drinking makes you cooler.

Jess: "Drinking to be cool, Nick? That's not a real thing."

Nick: "That's the only thing in the world I know to be true."

Cover Image Credit: Hollywood Reporter

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The Zodiac Signs As Bath And Body Works Scents

Just in case you want to know what scent you are!

Bath and Body Works fans could be considered to be part of a cult. The scents draw you in as if calling your name, if you ever
wondered what your scent should be based on your zodiac sign, here it is!

Aries: Country Apple

The rather impulsive Aries takes their time picking and choosing the scents from Bath and Body Works. The soothing scent of a fresh apple orchard is just what they need on a daily basis to keep up with their shenanigans.

Taurus: Japanese Cherry Blossom

The personality of a Taurus is stubborn, or what I like to say, is stuck in their ways. When they first discovered this scent in middle school, this was it. This is the only scent you will find anywhere around a Taurus.

Libra: Pink Chiffon

Pink Chiffon is another cult classic. This best selling scent went out of style for a hot second but is back and bigger than ever.

Leo: Thousand Wishes

Thousand Wishes is a purr-fect scent for a Leo. The light scent adornes the wearer just the right amount to get the desired reaction from those around them.

Aquarius: Be Enchanted

The rather cold personality of an Aquarius is counteracted by the loving scent of Be Enchanted. The scent is just enough tenderness for the wearer to be relaxed.

Gemini: Moonlight Path

Gemini's constantly change their favorite scent and are in and out of the store almost weekly to by new lotions, candles, and body washes. You will never see a full empty bottle of anything, however, Moonlight Path is the scent they keep coming back to again and again.

Virgo: Sea Island Cotton

The clean personality of a Virgo must be matched with the clean scent of Sea Island Cotton.

Capricorn: Cucumber Melon

Another clean scent of Cucumber Melon is the exact thing a Capricorn needs. The balance and calming scents are what make this scent so attractive to a Capricorn.

Scorpio: Paris Amour

The light scent is what you would expect from an extreme sign like a Scorpio. The scent lightly washes over the wearer in almost a cloud that

Sagittarius: Cashmere Glow

Cashmere Glow is a perfect scent for the winter sign. The vanilla and golden peach scent is just the mixture that creates the perfect accessory in the chilly months.

Pisces: Warm Vanilla Sugar

This lovely scent accentuates the lovely personality of a Pisces. They can never get enough of this scent so they just keep buying and buying until they have a full stockpile.

Cancer: Velvet Sugar

Velvet Sugar is the perfect blend of red velvet and strawberries and a Cancer is always changing their mind. The wearer can tell if it is a more red velvet or strawberry kind of day, and that is the balance that they need in their lives.

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