To The Friends I've Drifted Away From, I'm Sorry

To The Friends I've Drifted Away From, I'm Sorry

I never wanted it to happen.

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We swore it would never happen. We promised to keep in touch every day and see each other every chance we got and we'd never let our friendships fade away into sweet nothings.

But then we grew up.

We went to college, we got involved, we took hard classes that took up all of our time. We got jobs, part-time or full-time, we worked odd hours and had to come in early or stay late.

Messages are sent and often read, but not responded to, and if they are responded to, it's hours after they're sent.

At the end of the day when we finally get home, we're so tired that we don't even want to do anything. We just go home, eat and sleep. It's like an endless cycle.

Trying to make plans to hang out and see each other often fails because our schedules are opposite, we're crunching time for deadlines and we have other things going on.

What used to be back and forth banter for HOURS has turned into one or two-word text messages every few hours with the occasional "I miss you," or "We should hang out more."

Nothing hurts more than not being in the loop anymore about what's going on in your life. Often times, we find out about the most exciting things on Facebook or Instagram, and when we ask each other about it, we say "I was waiting to tell you in person!"

Sometimes, I feel like the worst person in the world for letting friendships fade away, but at the same time, I know that school has most of my attention right now and I don't have time for much else because I truly do need to pass my classes in order to graduate.

I'm sorry for letting our friendships unwind, break and become nonexistent. I'm sorry that our lives have become so separate that we have such opposite schedules and it's hard to keep up with each other.

Believe it or not, I didn't want our friendships to dwindle away and it seems like we barely know each other. I wanted our friendships to remain like they used to: strong, beautiful and so full of life.

As we've learned, life doesn't always go that way. We get pulled away from friends and thrown into school, work and any other things that keep us busy.

I'm glad to see that all of you are doing well. I truly do miss you. Maybe when things calm down and we aren't so busy, we can reunite again.

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it

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Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

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What It's Actually Like Moving States

How a central Iowa born and raised native ended up in Southern Missouri.

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Not a lot of people think moving states is a hard thing to do. If it's two hours away or, like me, seven hours away from your hometown, a move is a move and it can affect people in different ways.

Personally, my family was separated for a year, my mom and I still living in our hometown so I could finish high school, and my dad in Missouri working at his new job.

Then, in June my mom and I made the move so our family could be together once again. For us, we still had our home in Iowa, so my parents and I lived in an apartment until we could sell our home in Iowa and find what we wanted in Missouri.

The hardest things to get used too is the lifestyle of people in southern Missouri. People are a lot different down here than they were in Iowa. It was a big deal for us to move down here and adapt to a different lifestyle.

Something minor that was very hard to get used to was the usage of pop and soda. Most people don't even know what a "pop," is. In Iowa, a Pepsi or Coke is known as pop but down here it is called a soda.

That is just one example that was super hard to get used to. Something that is a little more of a big deal is the size of the city. In Iowa, I could get a coffee in about a five-minute drive. In Missouri, it takes a good fifteen minutes to drive there and who knows what the line will be like at the coffee shop. Those are minor things that my family struggled with adapting to.

Easily, the hardest thing was leaving friends and family. I came to Branson in the middle summer. This limited my job opportunities to none and made making new friends next to impossible.

This made my summer really hard and honestly boring. I knew this was best for my family, but I missed my friends and I wanted to be back in Iowa where all my friends were and my job used to be.

There were also a lot of perks from moving away from Iowa. First off, I completely went off the grid of my town and wanted to start completely new. I made new social media accounts and got a new phone number.

This made the transition easy because I was able to be who I wanted to be and keep in touch with the people I wanted to keep in touch with. This is something that a lot of people thought was pointless, but was such an important step for a fresh start.

Coming to Missouri, I know that sky is the limit and I have so many more opportunities of what I want to do. Overall, I would suggest moving states and starting knew. It feels good to finally be in a place that makes you truly happy as well as your family. Iowa is a fun place to visit sometimes and I'll always miss the sunsets but Missouri is my new home.

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