To My Friends Who Wonder Why I Ask Them Personal Details

To My Friends Who Wonder Why I Ask Them Personal Details

It's because I care.
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Growing up, I was taught to care for others. My inspirations told me the Golden rule was key, and my idols preached kindness and care. We all learned from Ellen DeGeneres to "Be kind to one another." Selena Gomez did write a song called "Kill em' with Kindness," and Brittany Snow continues to tell us that, yes, love is louder than anything. For the past six to seven years, I have made it my mission to help myself. This includes surrounding myself with people who pick me up, and vice versa.

Coming to college led me to meet some amazing people. From classes to clubs, and all over parts of my dorm I've experienced it all. When I say "caring for my friends," I mean taking the time to remember the little things about them that are actually really important in their lives. I'm talking names of mothers and father, sisters, and brothers, their middle name, etc... they all think I'm a little weird for wanting to care, but, guys, if you're reading this, here's why I do it.

My professional goal is to be a high school social worker or psychologist. To do so, you have to be an avid listener and have a decent memory at the same time. I've known this for a long time. My whole life I would question what I would be when I grew up. Literally, whenever I was asked that question I'd say that I have no idea.

BUT!

When I was 12, something clicked in my mind and I knew that one day I had to sit in an office and listen to people about their problems. (I later learned this is called a psychologist/ social worker). You don't have to have a license to care about others. Sure, knowing that I can count on my brain to remember important details will help me in my profession; but it's important now that my friends realize that I listen to what they say to me.

*Not actual examples*

For instance:

Friend: "Jamie, my grandma isn't feeling well. She may have to go to the hospital."

Me: "Oh, do you mean [insert name]? I remember you were telling me how she wasn't feeling well. What's going on?"

or...

Friend: "My brother got the job! I'm so proud of him."

Me: "Oh, please. [Insert name ]? I knew he'd be a shoe-in."

or...

Friend: "My sister is pissing me off again."

Me: "Which one?"

*tells me*

"OK, this seems familiar. Let's talk about it."

* * *

Point being, from personal experience, I know how important it is to remember certain aspects of a person's life, especially if you know them for a long time. Asking who and why are fine for the first few days, but it's like constantly asking someone to repeat their name. It just gets annoying. So, I make this a point to know stuff about my friends.

Now, can I get annoying or creepy about this? Sure, but I don't do anything with the information. I may toss out a name here and there, but it's all in good taste. I don't recommend this if you don't know the people well enough, however. My friends and I have spent hours together do many things.

Playing video games, talking, getting dinner, and going on adventures in the woods. When you spend so much time with people who don't make you want to bash your head into a wall. So make it a point to know the minuscule, yet important, details about your friends. That way they know you are appreciative of them!

So to those who I call my friends, that's why I always ask. I am nosey, but I know they make you guys laugh. I do it cause I actually make it a point to care about your lives.

Thank you for putting up with my crazy antics and for being awesome people.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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My brother and his wife recently blessed our family with the sweetest bundle of joy on planet earth. OK, I may be a little bias but I believe it to be completely true. I have never been baby crazy, but this sweet-cheeked angel is the only exception. I am at an age where I do not want children yet, but being able to love on my nephew like he is my own is so satisfying.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her a very protective person.

From making sure the car seat is strapped in properly before every trip, to watching baby boy breathe while he sleeps, you'll never meet someone, besides mommy and daddy of course, who is more concerned with the safety of that little person than me.

When you make a girl an aunt, you give her a miniature best friend.

There is something about an aunt that is so fun. An aunt is a person you go to when you think you're in trouble or when you want something mom and dad said you couldn't have. An aunt is someone who takes you to get ice cream and play in the park to cool down after having a temper tantrum. I can't wait to be the one he runs to.

When you make a girl an aunt, she gets to skip on the difficulty of disciplining.

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Finding Your Niche In College Starts With Finding You

Attempting to be someone you are not for the sake of having company only hurts you in the long run.

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Transitioning to college is hard enough, but trying to find a place where you feel "at home" can make this time even more stressful. Here are some tips on how to find that place/group of people that make you feel like sunshine.

I have always felt a little out of place wherever I went, but it wasn't until college that I realized that this feeling was so special and more people should capitalize on their differences rather than conforming to a certain mold. Transitioning to college and finding your place among so many people can be very overwhelming. The added stress of attempting to be someone you aren't for the sake of having company adds a whole other layer to this problem. The easiest thing for me to do in any situation like this is trying to make the setting a little smaller. One of the most obvious ways to do this on a college campus is by getting involved!

It is inevitable that within the first few weeks of the semester at any college, there will be an organization fair. This is a chance to scope out all that your school has to offer! Chances are there will be some type of group or club that lines up with your interests. Most college campuses have extracurricular opportunities ranging from social sororities and fraternities, professional ones, intermural sports, vocal groups, and so many more. You are more than likely going to find some type of organization that you can call home if you seek them out. Joining an organization is such an easy way to interact with people with similar interests. An interest can bring two completely different people together and create some beautiful friendships. It is situations like this where it is important to be your authentic self and mingle with those you share something with.

That being said, finding your place in college isn't always about being involved. Getting involved on campus is just one of the simplest ways to start. There are so many other opportunities on campus to meet people whether it be among others in your residence hall, people in your classes, or just people you find yourself stumbling upon! Finding people to spend your time with is easy; however, you should make it a point to surround yourself with people who bring you up.

Once you have a set group of people that you find yourself spending time with, it is important to pay attention to the way you feel when you're around them. If you find yourself feeling bad about yourself or get the impression that you need to change something in order to "fit in," chances are the people you're around are not the best for you or your self-esteem. It is important to surround yourself with people who allow you to feel comfortable in your own skin. That being said, you also want people who encourage you to make good decisions and help you reach your goals. People who encourage toxic behavior in your life might be fun in the short term, but in the grand scheme of things, you need to be surrounded by people with your best interest in mind. Essentially, surrounding yourself with people who influence you to be your best self is one of the best decisions you can make short and long term.

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