To The Best Friends I Don't See Often

To The Best Friends I Don't See Often

I know that you will always be there for me, no matter how far apart we are.
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Maybe college can separate us on the map, but nothing will ever break our bond. Although we may not talk or see each other every day, I know that I can always count on the two of you to be there for me no matter what.

Senior year is what really brought all of us together. Sitting in study hall bored out of our minds every day really led us to have this bond that I never had with any other friends. Getting to go to the cafe together during study hall even though our teacher was against groups going was one of my favorite parts of that year because we would all get to leave our cold, quiet room in the corner for a while and get to walk around together.

I am so lucky to have both of you, and I don’t know what I would do without you. You make me feel like I’m a part of something, a group that I never had, a long-lasting friendship that I have always dreamed of.

So now, being 26 miles and 280 miles away from each of you, sometimes I get a little lonely without you by my side. But, whenever I need you or whenever you need me we’re always there to answer our phones. Seeing you on breaks is what makes home feel like home, and whenever our breaks don’t overlap and you come to visit you make Delaware feel like a piece of home is here too.

Getting notifications from both of you brightens my day every time, and I know that we don’t talk enough. When we do talk we all just pick up where we left off and we catch everyone up on what’s been happening in our lives. That’s the friendship that I’ve always needed. No one in our little group ever feels out of place or anything like I may have felt in fake high school friend groups. We’re all so similar and it feels like we’re really meant to be best friends.

From planning beach trips for this summer to talking about concerts to scheduling trips down to Delaware for weekends out, I know that with you I will always have a good time. Being able to talk to the two of you about absolutely anything is the best part about us. I know that I can trust you with absolutely anything that may be going on in my life and that’s just how the three of us always are.

So maybe I don’t get to see you two everyday like I did in high school. Maybe we don’t talk everyday. Maybe things are changing. What I know for sure is that we will all always be there for each other through everything. We’re all lucky to have each other because each of us gels so well with the other two that it just makes being together that much better as a friend group. See you May 24 loves.

XOXO,

M

Cover Image Credit: Mekenna Passner

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39 Things Every Girl Should Really Know About Life By 20

38. When vacationing by airplane, try to fit everything into a carry-on.
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1. Dispute ALL tickets... even if you were going 35mph over the speed limit.

ticket

How can it hurt? If anything you can save yourself some money.

2. If you're not 10 minutes early, you're late.

Your boss, your teachers, your co-workers... They all notice. Be the early one.

3. If you find yourself waking up feeling miserable, start the day by making your bed and washing your face.

Coming back to a made bed after a sh*tty day can change the world.

4. It's okay to fall off track once in a while. You'll only be wiser for next time. (Don't push it, though!)

When I say fall off track I don't mean COMPLETELY off... Just make sure you hold onto something that reminds you to keep going. You'll figure it out... Sometimes it takes years and that's okay.

5. Don't fight your family. They ARE always going to love you.

family

I used to fight my family and try to push them away... It was probably the dumbest thing I've ever done looking back. So, even if you say, "I'm never going to like them!" Trust me you will. Unless they're actually toxic a**holes...

6. Mom actually, seriously, literally, insanely knows everything.

It's crazy, I swear my mom is psychic. Or she can see the future. I used to do the opposite of what she said and my life was messier... Now that I found out about her powers I listen and things run smoother. Weird. Love you, Ma.

7. If an elder in your family tries giving you money as a gift or to cover lunch... Reject it first.

They won't stop insisting and they will force you to take the money even if you say no 3,000 times. So why not earn some brownie points and act like you seriously didn't need it. Meanwhile, you know how badly you need it.

8. An e-mail and/or a phone call goes a long way.

Don't pester... But if you're the one who calls to "follow up on a resume," a week or two after you applied, you're the standout!

Also, as a college student, I find e-mailing and staying in touch with professors builds a relationship and engraves your name into their brains. As long as you're good at writing e-mails and a good student, they'll usually instinctively like you more; seeing how much effort you spent on communicating.

9. If you hate school, just suffer through the attendance, and make sure the teacher knows your name.

Even if you actually have no idea what Descartes sixth meditation is about... Just show up, do the work consistently, and build a relationship with the teacher. They won't fail you if they see effort. (Just don't give them a reason to!)

10. It seems like the end of the world sometimes... it's not.

"And this too shall pass."

11. If you hate yourself one day (or even all the time), just pretend you don't.

Did you know our facial expressions can influence our emotions?

12. Line up another miserable part-time job before quitting your current one.

work

Waitressing, customer service, reception... We've all been there and it usually sucks (Unless your parents spoil you too much). So, if you need to get the hell out of there, make sure you have somewhere else to go before you quit. And give 'em a notice in advance, don't be a d*ck.

13. Traveling is the best thing in the world.

travel

I don't need to explain much more. I think we can all agree we want to witness the beautiful parts of this world we've never seen before.

14. If someone doesn't say thank you when you hold the door for them...

...hit them with the classic under-your-breath-but-you-know-they-heard-you type of "you're welcome!"

15. Respect authority, even if you think you're right.

cops

Just FULLY cooperate and it WILL be easier. It's also great to make friends with authority figures. Talk to everyone! Make connections and maybe you'll learn something new.

16. Spend time outside and in public.

After high school, you aren't forced into a classroom five days a week where you will have to socialize. After high school, you can decide to chill in your room and do nothing. But seriously don't make a habit out of it, you will end up feeling like crap when you realize you have no friends.

17. Don't roll your eyes at people.

So rude. Eye-rolling just makes it look like you're admitting you're wrong and you have no defense to whatever made you roll your eyes.

18. Life's a b*tch and then you die... But guess what? Even B*tches have fun!

mean girls

News flash, we are currently all in the process of dying. Stop worrying so much and try to have fun even in the dullest of moments.

19. If you're speaking about something professional, call don't text.

You do realize we still have a call feature on the iPhone, right? Use it.

20. Decorate the Christmas tree with your family amidst your teen angst.

 christmas

It really seems like a horrible excursion to pile into a mini-van, cut down a tree in the freezing cold, and then hang shiny balls while developing a rash on your hand from the prickles... But down the road, you'll regret not doing it.

21. The D.A.R.E. program makes it seem like drugs are just freely handed out.

drugs

That sh*t's expensive. And you don't want to do it, anyway (Minus weed it's harmless, just wait until you're old enough!) .

22. Smile and say hi to as many people a day as you can.

You never know if you just made someone feel a little better or accepted.

23. Make sure the E-brake is OFF.

brake

It will sound like you're dragging a dead body attached to your car and will ruin your brakes. Just double check.

24. Use all your resources even when it seems pointless.

Even if you learn absolutely nothing, you gain connections.

25. What's most important in life?

Connections.

26. Know how to swim.

swim

It is a basic skill everyone should know. You don't need to be Phelps. Just doggy paddle if you're really that bad.

27. If you don't have a firm handshake, learn how to, a**hole.

handshake

If you are a lady shaking a man's hand, strive to have a firmer grip than him. You'll either scare the sh*t out of him, gain serious respect, or get complimented on how great your handshake is! That's my favorite compliment if I'm being honest.

28. Step back and think before you explode.

Seriously dude, don't press send. You probably used the words, "like" and "literally" too much in your text, anyway. Wait 10 minutes and see if it's worth it.

Also, it's better in person.

29. Question everything.

question

Never assume you're safe or well-informed. There could be a murderer in that restaurant... Question anything that you aren't sure of. Hell, even question what you are sure of.

30. Don't trust a headline or statistic until you know it's credible.

What if you're looking at a bar graph from 1968, not 2018? You might think this is obvious, but there are clearly plenty of people who share false information. We've probably done it ourselves before. We should all work on that.

31. Park far from the store.

parkng

Walk, you lazy youthful soul. Unless you require a handicap spot or weather conditions are poor.

32. Take the stairs.

"I have no time to workout!" *takes elevator*

33. Don't text people when you want to tell them how you feel.

It only makes you feel good for like 20 seconds and then you'll probably read it back saying, "What was I thinking?"

34. Have something to be proud of.

Otherwise, you'll get lost. Life is confusing.

35. Listen to old school music, the classics, and artists who inspired what we hear today.

music

We cannot let the real instruments die people. Do you know how fun a jam band show is?

36. If you're inspired, act fast.

Don't let inspiration slip away. Sometimes it's easy to forget that great feeling.

37. If you start, finish.

Finish what you start and do the best you can at it. We all have off days, that doesn't mean you suck if you mess something up a few times.

38. When vacationing by airplane, try to fit everything into a carry-on.

beer

You don't want your favorite bikini stowed in the wrong plane when you go on vacation. Plus you spent all of your money on Corona's and can't buy a new one.

39. Change your oil.

Love your car and it will try to love you back.

Good Luck!

Cover Image Credit: Emily Fahey

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You Get What You Need, Not What You Want

What challenges us changes us for the better.
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Here I am. Sand beneath my feet, wind brushing between my arms, and knee deep in the ocean. I inhale the salty, sea breeze that fills my lungs, and gradually submerge myself in the water. I take special note to the way each strand of seaweed gently glided past my skin. I noticed the way the seagulls on shore gathered in flocks when food was near.

Sometimes, I'll stop mid task and think about all the ways in which my life unfolded, and how it materialized the way it did. Not often, but sporadically, I'll wonder how certain experiences ended so horribly wrong, and how others, went so perfectly well.

During tumultuous times, it is easy to fall prey to the idea that life simply isn't fair. In many cases, that may be true, life isn't fair. Life has a special way of marking us with unpalatable hardships, hardships that if survived, create an inner confidence that you may never have experienced, had you remained in your comfort zone.

Challenges are a part of everyday life. They test you and they empower you to find out what you're capable of. When something comes too easily to us, it becomes easy to take it for granted.

How can we truly appreciate something we didn't earn?

Life has a way of testing your mental strength when you least expect it. These tests can come in any form. For some, the challenge is doing well at school, for others, it is getting a grip on financials.

But, regardless of the challenge, facing up to it is key; dealing with your strifes head on. Doing so will teach you what you're capable of, when the cards are down and a situation seems too bleak to change, and yet you persevered.

I remember countless nights which I laid on my back, gazing out my bedroom window, and dreamt of a world where certain past events never happened, where teenage girls weren't catty and where boys treated all girls with respect, regardless of attraction. I dreamt of a world where the deaths I'd experienced been undone, and my friends and family reigned in harmony. What I dreamt of was a fantasy world.

The most important lessons I’ve ever learned, have come from some extremely difficult times. I didn’t know it in the moment, it can be next to impossible to see the purpose of our struggles when we’re in the deepest, darkest corner of the pain. But if it’s there, you'll never know how strong you until it truly matters.

I remember one summer I was living in a small, rural village in Guilin, China. I was initially petrified of venturing out across the globe, without knowing a single soul in the region. The first night I arrived at my host families apartment, and as I realized that they didn't know a word of English, my heart sank. And yet, I was able to adjust to a kind and loving family, a family who welcomed me into their home, who tried to accommodate me in any way they could, and as a result, my language skills flourished.

Although my heart raced each time I spoke with a local, I can say with utmost certainty that I have never experienced true confidence quite like having a conversation with a local in China. I remember the first time I attempted to buy an apple from a fruit vendor, and she had no idea what I was saying, regardless of how hard I tried to pronounce the proper tones. The next day I returned, bought an apple and this time, she understood a little bit more. I would continue to buy an apple from her everyday for the remainder of my time in Guilin, each time speaking with her more and more.

I was by no means in my comfort zone, and yet, I have never experience peace quite like rural China. I remember one weekend, a few of my western friends and I had gone down to the Li River, and hired a bamboo raft guide to take us through the mountain ranges.

From the vivid, crystal blue water, it resembled a painting we were floating through. I could imagine to the water colors flowing to and fro from the paint brush and the grand mountains ran from the artists finger tips into the sunset. Colors and textures flourished and created a landscape of true beauty.

Trees covered the shores grey and blue rocks. The suns rays lit the land and reflected off the water and to the river boats that ran up and down the river. Bamboo logs painted with browns, greens, oranges, yellows and reds contained countless small and insignificant people. No one could tame, or capture, or recreate the landscape on the grand scale in which it was created. And no foreigner, or local Chinese man giving guided passages could possibly put a price on the region.

I laid on the edge of the raft, as we gracefully followed the stream's current.The intense sun rays soothed my skin, and eased my mind. The raft smelt of pine, seashore, and cooked rice. My feet draped off the bottom of the raft and splashed my lower shins as they floated through the water.

One of the people I was with water colors flowing to and fro from the paint brush and the grand mountains ran from the artists finger tips into the sunset. Colors and textures flourished and created a landscape of true beauty.

The harsh sun rays melted away my thoughts as we gracefully followed the rivers rhythm. It smelt of pine, seashore, cooked rice and whatever else China smelt like. My feet hung off the end of the raft and splashed my lower shins as they floated through the water. It felt like heaven in an instant.

Know that there is a reason to why we’re here, even when things get hard. It’s comforting to me, right now, as I have moved through some of the most heartbreaking, and beautiful moments of my life.



I can recall the moments of injustice that I had previously suffered at the hands of close friends. I can recall the kindness I'd been shown by total strangers. I can think back and pull up over a dozen past experiences in which life showed me an obstacle, and after finding a solution I felt stronger for it.

When you fixate on the problems that you’re facing, you create and prolong negative emotions and stress, which hinders performance. When you focus on actions to better yourself and your circumstances, you create a sense of personal efficacy, which produces positive emotions and improves performance.

The people closest to us show us the way by triggering the old, the unconscious, the pain. Running from difficulty because it is challenging is missing out on the greatest learning. Daydreams turn to nightmares and nightmares turn to daydreams and round and round it goes until we make peace with where we are and who we are here with the epitome of mental strength—seeing opportunity and taking action when things look bleak.


Running from difficulty because it is challenging is missing out on the greatest learning. Daydreams turn to nightmares and nightmares turn to daydreams and round and round it goes until we make peace with where we are and who we are here with. At the end of the day… It’s all love.

Don’t miss out on it by looking the other way.


“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”

Paulo Coelho, The Devil and Miss Prym


I believe the universe will never give you anything you can’t handle.







Cover Image Credit: personal

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