Freshman year can be a chaotic time for any student, but the adaptation process can be even tougher for international students. Even after almost five years in the country I am still learning new words in English every day and I am still adapting to this country’s culture. This are the four things I wish someone who’ve told me before embarking on college life in the United States.
1. If you’re Hispanic, or French, or Italian, or Arab, or Eastern European DON’T greet people with a kiss, or two, or three on the cheek
I certainly wished I knew that, especially as a young woman. I mistakenly thought that because EVERYONE greeted each other in Venezuela, my home country, with a kiss on the cheek it was completely normal to do that in the United States. If you are as naïve as I was, you may think a kiss on the cheek while meeting someone for the first time is admissible but believe me, it is not. It can be painfully awkward to try to greet an American that way as he/she may think you are invading their personal space, hitting on them, or will be standing paralyzed clueless on what to do. Stick with a handshake and if you start getting to know the person well, a sort of semi-hug that I personally feel is way more uncomfortable than a kiss, will do. You’ll eventually get used to it… I think (I honestly still can’t!)
2. Don’t start all your sentences with “well, in my country we do it X, Y, Z way…”
I like to think that I didn’t make this mistake, but I think we all do this especially the first couple of weeks we are in a new country. I am not saying you should strip yourself from all the aspects of your culture and forget where you come from, but you should make a conscientious effort to immerse yourself in the new country you’ll be a part of for at least the next four years. Though some may be interested in how things were done in your country, not everyone is; let them be the closed-minded ones and not yourself –find that balance between understanding that your way isn't unquestionably the right way and not letting go of your own social mores.
3. Don’t limit your social circle to only people from your own country/culture/ethnic group
It is a fact in Sociology that we tend to surround ourselves with those who have a similar background as we do. It feels familiar and it gives us a sense of security. However, the beauty of studying in this country is that you’ll have the opportunity of socializing with people from every corner in the world. If you step out of your comfort zone, you will open myriad opportunities for yourself. You’ll probably learn new words in another language, taste new foods, find out about the existence of countries you’ve never heard of, and all that without having to buy a plane ticket. Don’t stay in a bubble and mingle, mingle, mingle!
4. Don’t let your accent or “limited” English make you feel inferior
Easier said than done, I know. My freshmen year I sounded pretty much like Sofia Vergara from Modern Family and I hated it. I didn’t like my accent because I was embarrassed and it kept me from engaging in so many on campus organizations because I was afraid people would judge me for my accent. Ironically, the more you exclude yourself from engaging in social or volunteering activities, the less you’ll expand your English knowledge. I am pretty sure it’s all in your head; however if you do encounter someone that is rude, just think about it this way: most likely than not, you know WAY more English than they’ll ever know your mother tongue – let them hate. Now that I’ve been here for a while I understand more than ever that an accent is a sign of bravery, embrace it!
