There was a sense of happiness that sat inside my demeanor as I rested myself on a couch in the atrium of American University’s School of International Service. I had put together an event that wasn't what I wanted, but people were enjoying to an extent. Buzzing around me were about 120 people dressed to impress sipping on ice tea and dancing to Future. Meanwhile, I was sitting on the couch unbothered, but not engaged. It wasn't long before a friend stopped to ask the much-anticipated question, “Are you ok?” It's a question that I am all too familiar with. I’ve been asked that question an estimated 15,000 times since I turned fifteen. My answer is always something in reference to a quote from the great Matthew McConhaughey, “I'm not too good at parties.” Most people would respond to that by quoting the great Woody Harrelson, “You're not too good outside of them either.” This is true. I'm socially awkward and I own that, but it's not the major reason I am the way I am. I am quiet, reserved and often “tired” looking or recluse because I am vitamin B12 deficient.

B12 is a particular vitamin that acts as a source of energy throughout your day. Being that it is a vitamin within your body, it's not a disability that you can see. It won't visibly effect the way I speak, act or do anything else for that matter. It basically means that I have to take a supplement each day to combat it, but even with the vitamin boost, I'm still tired. I can get eight, nine or ten hours of sleep and still be somewhat tired. At the very least, I look tired to a lot of people. As a result, people may think that I am tired or uninterested when they engage me, which is often not the case. Being vitamin B12 deficient and being more tired than the average person, often makes me difficult to deal with. When I get tired, I'm often easily irritated or look disinterested. Furthermore, being easily irritated leads to disputes with friends, arguments with girlfriends, etc. It just makes life hard. Not to mention, it can make me more likely to lose vision and be depressed, which probably explains the glasses I'm supposed to wear on a regular basis and the fact that I've been in and out of therapy since the age of six.

I layout all of these things about being B12 deficient not because I want sympathy or to write a sob story. If you know me, you know the last thing I want is sympathy. Actually, having been aware of my B12 deficiency since my freshman year of

high school has given me a good amount of time to learn how to deal with it. In addition, it's not a life threatening condition in the way that diabetes, cancer, etc. can be.

I write this story for two reasons. The first reason is that I want people to stop asking me, “Are you ok?” whenever I'm sitting by myself. I am socially awkward and B12 deficient. I am sitting by myself because most of the time I don't know how to start a conversation with someone unless I know them pretty well. The second reason I write this story is because we, myself included, often forget there are hundreds upon hundreds of illnesses and disabilities out there that you can't see at surface level. By looking at me, you wouldn't know I'm B12 deficient. By looking at the person next to me, you wouldn't know he’s depressed. By looking at the person next to him, you wouldn't know she’s anemic. There's a lot more to people than what you see at the surface. Its often hard to do, but we should try to learn someone's background before we begin to question how they act in the foreground. It's tough, but if we were in their shoes, we would want someone to at least try. Try. That's all that they're asking.