FOMO: otherwise known as fear of missing out. My spidey senses, or I should say nerdy, statistic reading, people watching, story empathizing sources tell me many people experience FOMO. Or I should say the Memes tell me so? #WhatAmIDoingWithMylife
Wanting to be involved in as much as possible is typically not a bad thing. It shows enthusiasm, commitment and passion. But what happens when the fear takes over and the missing out becomes the deliquescing of ourselves, like dissolving in hot water by spreading ourselves too thin? Even though he was exhausted, John's FOMO got the best of him and he went to the party.
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I am no stranger to FOMO…actually I’ve missed many events, by choice – it’s always a choice, I think my FOMO is now reversed itself and is growing back. Let me clarify. I’m not sitting at home being a lump on a log but even if I were shouldn’t I be able to do so guilt free? Do I have to worry about being breezy? Inserting clip of favorite show because everything reverts back to F.R.I.E.N.D.S…duh.
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We’re social creatures. A lot of us are people pleasers, some of us are ego driven (don’t deny it you instagramers with way more followers than followings), or maybe we’re so fearful of missing out we do everything possible to convince ourselves we don’t belong and that we shouldn’t go out. I suppose it’s time to mention a painful truth - there were times in college when I would be sitting outside my sorority house before chapter, knowing that although no one was vicious, I just didn’t really have any friends in there. I had to pump myself up to go in smiling, to be friendly and make small talk, knowing most, if not all of those girls, really didn’t want to get caught up talking with me. The thing is I wasn’t cool and I was too shy in that group for them to ever know I was charmingly weird. ;) I didn’t have a fear of missing out; I just missed out. And it wasn’t so scary. Being invisible gave me the courage to explore and stand on my own, it became my super power and I wouldn’t take any of it back.
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I think it’s a balancing act between the things we worry about missing out on and the things we lose if we’re out doing all these things. I learned how to say no. It’s hard saying no to people; no to events and people that do not serve me, no to the things that do not fill me up and energize me so I can actually do the things that bring me joy, center me and make me a better person. Now, I’m learning to say yes. To the big and beautiful unknown of yes.
Saying yes can be good and saying yes can be bad. I’m not here to decide for you but whatever you decide, choose what makes you whole, stronger, and at peace. Fear or no fear.
Video Credit: YouTube