Sometimes when I'm driving down a familiar road, in a store, or at work, the memories will flood in.

images of years bygone, a lifetime separate from now.

equal time without to with, yet occasionally just as painful as though it were yesterday.

The flashback pauses.

I catch myself in an old coffeeshop. Why am i here? This hasn't been the norm for two years, what am I doing?

But in the moment it seems as though everything is normal.

Then the new memories come in.

The memories of immediately after.

Not eating or sleeping,

pretending everything is okay when actually it is the opposite.

Where are you?

it shouldn't matter, it doesn't matter, but in random moments, it does.

I am okay now, but i wasn't then.

the flashbacks serve as a reminder of this time.

I breathe in.

It's okay now, life is good again.

Stronger and better now than before,

different than I was then,

but happier.

The worst thing that could happen at that time in my life did, but I survived.

The flashback comes, but I breathe in and out.

Things are okay.