What It's Like Being Unhappy And How To Fix It

What It's Like Being Unhappy And How To Fix It

But here's the thing, don't we deserve better?

Lately, I've been thinking about people and being unhappy. I'm a people watcher. I observe almost everyone. I know it sounds creepy but I think about that bruise on that woman's cheek. I wonder if it got there by accident or on purpose.

I wonder why people stay in unhappy situations for so long. For example, take domestic abuse. I lived in that environment and I always wondered why don't you just leave? I know I sound hypocritical but I was there, in that same position, and I left. It hurt and it was so hard but I did it. I found a way.

Or the girl who stays in the bad relationship? Why? Just leave. If you aren't happy, go. End things. It's better for both parties. I can see that unhappiness weighs on the people I watch and the people I know.

I see it in their eyes and in the way they move. I see that desperate glean in their eyes. I also know that feeling of being in a terrible, cruel relationship. You want to leave so badly but then the unhappiness tells you, you aren't good enough to get more and to "power through," that things will get better.

But they don't get better and your unhappiness grows.

But here's the thing, don't we deserve better? Why should we stay unhappy? I decided to change things. I left my home. Then I left my ex behind. The unhappiness of everything that happened choked my voice down and I couldn't remember what I liked. I didn't know who I was. I left and began to regain who I was.

I know one thing someone I love struggles with is weight. It brings him extreme unhappiness. I don't try to understand his pain because I'm tiny and I always have been. I don't try to relate because it minimizes his feelings.

He sees something completely different from me. He sees a huge man, who is so overweight. The truth is, he isn't. He's very fit, way more than I ever will be. His weight brings him this unwavering unhappiness that affects his self-esteem.

To help alleviate that, every day I tell him how handsome he is and how attractive I find him. I tell him when he feels or thinks something negative, replace that negative with a positive. I may not understand his struggle exactly, but I do know what it's like to have negative thoughts about oneself. I would think and say terrible things about myself, but that was only dragging me down.

Now, I tell him to do what I did. Every day, I looked in the mirror and told myself that I was good enough, smart enough, pretty enough. Soon, the words sunk in and I started believing it.

I wholly believe in mind over matter. It changed my life, and I let go of the unhappiness. I believed I was good enough, smart enough, and pretty enough. And I still do.

One thing people know about me is that I'm blunt, almost rudely so. I have no filter and say what comes to my mind. It started because I used to hold my thoughts, feelings, and ideas back. One day, I just got fed up and started telling people exactly how I felt. It lifted some more of my unhappiness from my heart.

Lately, my job has been bringing me a lot of unhappiness. Things changed in the past few months. I used to love my job and everything about it, but now I dread it. So, what am I doing about my unhappiness?

I talked to my boss and we are trying to work things out. If I don't feel happy by the time school starts, I'll start looking for a new job. If something doesn't serve a purpose and fulfill you in the way you want, you have to change it because no one will do it for you.

If you want to leave your job, do it. If you stayed in a job that took you nowhere, leave and find the job you love. After all, you'll be doing it your whole life, so you better make sure it gives you the things you want.

Another thing that has been brining me unhappiness is my relationships. I've been pretty mum about it, but I want more. I want to move forward in life and it's not happening. If you know anything about me, its the fact that I can't stay still for too long. I have a wild heart. I'm a wanderer.

I need progression. I need fulfillment. I'm not getting it. This unhappiness I need to change and I'm working on it. Each day, I move closer to shedding the unhappiness my relationships bring because the parties involved talked about it with me and we are taking steps to resolve it. I want to have a family of my own some day, ya know? I can't stand here and wait forever.

It's never too late to leave and regain that happiness that you deserve. I evaluate every day the things that are making me happy and the things that aren't.

Removing the unhappiness takes time. It's not a quick process but it can be done. Step by step, you can be happy, you just have to stay positive and work on it. Before you know it, you'll be happy again.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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Yes, I Made My Cat An Instagram

I follow my cat around like her own personal paparazzi.

Yes, the headline you just read is true. I have in fact created an Instagram account for my cat. I know, it does sound a little crazy. What respectable person does that? Well, I do. A bored college student home for winter break for six weeks.

Now, in the beginning, it started as some crazy idea that came to me while I was lying in bed on my phone at two a.m. Velvet, my cat, was sleeping on my bed and I looked at her and thought to myself, ‘She is just as cute as any other pet account that I follow on Instagram,’.

So, her Instagram account, @velvet.blackcat, was born. I posted the first picture, one I had taken when I was packing for my bags for college, and introduced her to the Instagram world. I followed some accounts that also featured black cats, turned my phone off and went to sleep.

Now, this might be the part of the story where the next morning I turn my phone back on and was ecstatic to see Velvet had all of these new followers. No, that is not the case. She had garnered a few likes on her first picture, and a couple of followers.

Some might think that I’m exploiting Velvet’s cuteness just for followers. While she is very adorable, I genuinely enjoy taking artsy pictures of her each day, editing, and posting them. Her follower count has steadily risen and it’s enjoyable to interact with different accounts that are also dedicated to their pets.

While most who read this will think it’s a little crazy, I’ve found it as a fun sort of hobby to do during the day. I like looking at the different cats and dogs whose owners have also created Instagrams for them and they post daily on what they have done that day.

It also allows me to spend more time with Velvet, more so than I already do. I follow her around the house now and wait for her to do something cute like play with her toys, roll over, or fall asleep in a cute position.

I’ve also found a new outlet for creativity as well. I found that I enjoy the process of taking pictures. I like finding the how the light reflects off different objects in the room to create a unique looking picture.

I enjoy taking on a different sort of role of writing. It’s fun and creative and enjoyable. It’s amazing to see all different types of animals that have owners who love them so much.

I encourage anyone who has an animal to start an Instagram for them. It’s a different way to spend time with your favorite furry friend and to connect with other people from around the world. Take some time out of your day to spend with your pets, take cute pictures, and don’t be afraid to lay on the ground and play with them!

Cover Image Credit: Ariana Pelosci

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Don't Let Fear Stop You From Branching Out

“Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.”

A few days into the new year and the new semester, and I’m still sticking with one of my resolutions: to branch out. I feel like my first semester was a lot of trying to get settled in and somewhat testing the waters. It was strictly school work and just hanging out with a couple of friends.

However, I felt somewhat disappointed that I didn’t meet more people, and I realized that if that’s something I want to happen, I have to do more than sit in my dorm; therefore I made branching out a goal of mine for the spring semester. Honestly, I am so excited about it.

My roommate and I are basically in this together, and one thing we decided to start doing is work out classes and yoga. This obviously does not sound appealing, but I was willing to try it. I knew that this wasn’t anything I was interested in, but I felt like for the sake of my resolution, it definitely couldn’t hurt.

But I was nervous. I didn’t like the thought of working out in front of other people. I don’t like people seeing me in a state where I am somewhat vulnerable. I was actually nervous to take a class. I didn’t want to have to experience the judgement of anyone else in the room around me. I finally I thought, “You know what? Who cares. You are trying to better yourself “

So, I went. I experienced some of the worst pain ever, but it was so worth it. I realized it was something that I enjoy doing and made me feel good. I didn’t feel a single look of judgement. I felt a room of people supporting each other that are working toward the same/similar goal. It felt nice that all of us had a common interest. We talked to people, we laughed, and we ached.

I tell this story to say that you shouldn’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone. A quote by Robert Tew says, “Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.” He couldn’t be more correct. Though I am applying this to something as simple as taking a yoga class, this can apply to many situations in life. We so often find fear holding us back.

I find myself often referring back to lessons my dad taught me. One of the greatest lessons he ever taught me was not to let fear restrict me. I was such a scared child. I was scared of everything. I missed out on many opportunities because of the fears that ate at me. My dad reminded me that I will never know unless I try, so I began to try. I began to see success and growth in my life and my confidence.

I still find myself being scared at times. Most of the time, it’s over something silly, but it is something big to me. If it holds me back, it’s a big deal. Your fears are a big deal, but you can overcome them.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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