What It's Like Being Unhappy And How To Fix It

What It's Like Being Unhappy And How To Fix It

But here's the thing, don't we deserve better?

Lately, I've been thinking about people and being unhappy. I'm a people watcher. I observe almost everyone. I know it sounds creepy but I think about that bruise on that woman's cheek. I wonder if it got there by accident or on purpose.

I wonder why people stay in unhappy situations for so long. For example, take domestic abuse. I lived in that environment and I always wondered why don't you just leave? I know I sound hypocritical but I was there, in that same position, and I left. It hurt and it was so hard but I did it. I found a way.

Or the girl who stays in the bad relationship? Why? Just leave. If you aren't happy, go. End things. It's better for both parties. I can see that unhappiness weighs on the people I watch and the people I know.

I see it in their eyes and in the way they move. I see that desperate glean in their eyes. I also know that feeling of being in a terrible, cruel relationship. You want to leave so badly but then the unhappiness tells you, you aren't good enough to get more and to "power through," that things will get better.

But they don't get better and your unhappiness grows.

But here's the thing, don't we deserve better? Why should we stay unhappy? I decided to change things. I left my home. Then I left my ex behind. The unhappiness of everything that happened choked my voice down and I couldn't remember what I liked. I didn't know who I was. I left and began to regain who I was.

I know one thing someone I love struggles with is weight. It brings him extreme unhappiness. I don't try to understand his pain because I'm tiny and I always have been. I don't try to relate because it minimizes his feelings.

He sees something completely different from me. He sees a huge man, who is so overweight. The truth is, he isn't. He's very fit, way more than I ever will be. His weight brings him this unwavering unhappiness that affects his self-esteem.

To help alleviate that, every day I tell him how handsome he is and how attractive I find him. I tell him when he feels or thinks something negative, replace that negative with a positive. I may not understand his struggle exactly, but I do know what it's like to have negative thoughts about oneself. I would think and say terrible things about myself, but that was only dragging me down.

Now, I tell him to do what I did. Every day, I looked in the mirror and told myself that I was good enough, smart enough, pretty enough. Soon, the words sunk in and I started believing it.

I wholly believe in mind over matter. It changed my life, and I let go of the unhappiness. I believed I was good enough, smart enough, and pretty enough. And I still do.

One thing people know about me is that I'm blunt, almost rudely so. I have no filter and say what comes to my mind. It started because I used to hold my thoughts, feelings, and ideas back. One day, I just got fed up and started telling people exactly how I felt. It lifted some more of my unhappiness from my heart.

Lately, my job has been bringing me a lot of unhappiness. Things changed in the past few months. I used to love my job and everything about it, but now I dread it. So, what am I doing about my unhappiness?

I talked to my boss and we are trying to work things out. If I don't feel happy by the time school starts, I'll start looking for a new job. If something doesn't serve a purpose and fulfill you in the way you want, you have to change it because no one will do it for you.

If you want to leave your job, do it. If you stayed in a job that took you nowhere, leave and find the job you love. After all, you'll be doing it your whole life, so you better make sure it gives you the things you want.

Another thing that has been brining me unhappiness is my relationships. I've been pretty mum about it, but I want more. I want to move forward in life and it's not happening. If you know anything about me, its the fact that I can't stay still for too long. I have a wild heart. I'm a wanderer.

I need progression. I need fulfillment. I'm not getting it. This unhappiness I need to change and I'm working on it. Each day, I move closer to shedding the unhappiness my relationships bring because the parties involved talked about it with me and we are taking steps to resolve it. I want to have a family of my own some day, ya know? I can't stand here and wait forever.

It's never too late to leave and regain that happiness that you deserve. I evaluate every day the things that are making me happy and the things that aren't.

Removing the unhappiness takes time. It's not a quick process but it can be done. Step by step, you can be happy, you just have to stay positive and work on it. Before you know it, you'll be happy again.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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44 Lyrics For When You Need An Instagram Caption

Your caption is just as important as the filter.

Choosing the caption for your Instagram can be almost as challenging as deciding on a filter. So, if you’re ready to post that Insta, but don’t know what to say, here are 44 lyrics for when you need an Instagram caption.

1. “Be young, be dope, be proud.” - Lana Del Rey, "American"

2. “I can’t really see another squad tryna cross us.” - Drake, "No Tellin’"

3. “Darling I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” - Taylor Swift, "Blank Space"

4. “I’m throwin' shade like it’s sunny.” - Nicki Minaj, "Want Some More"

5. “I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist.” - Sia, "Chandelier"

6. “Find me where the wild things are.” - Alessia Cara, "Wild Things"

7. “If I was you, I'd wanna be me too.” - Meghan Trainor, "Me Too"

8. “Sweet like candy to my soul, sweet you rock and sweet you roll.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Crash Into Me"

9. “I swear this life is like the sweetest thing I’ve ever known.” - Drake, "Over"

10. “I hope you never lose your sense of wonder.” - Lee Ann Womack, "I Hope You Dance"

11. “But if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing’s changed at all? - Bastille, "Pompeii"

12. “You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one.” - John Lennon, "Imagine"

13. “You can’t choose what stays and what fades away.” - Florence + The Machine, "No Light, No Light"

14. “She acts like summer and walks like rain.” - Train, "Drops of Jupiter

15. “She’s a good girl, loves her mama. Loves Jesus, and America too.” - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, "Free Fallin’"

16. “Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones.” - Coldplay, "Fix You"

17. “Say you’ll remember me.” - Taylor Swift, "Wildest Dreams"

18. I’ve got thick skin and an elastic heart.” - Sia, "Elastic Heart"

19. “Give me the beat boys and free my soul.” - Uncle Kracker, "Drift Away"

20. “One of these days the clocks will stop, and time won’t mean a thing.” - Foo Fighters, "These Days"

21. “Sunshine mixed with a little hurricane.” - Brad Paisley, Perfect Storm

22. “You are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need.” Zedd feat. The Foxes, "Clarity"

23. “Her mind is Tiffany twisted, she’s got the Mercedes bends.” - The Eagles, "Hotel California"

24. “Life imitates art.” - Lana Del Rey, "Gods And Monsters"

25. “Nobody said it was easy, no one said it would be this hard.” - Coldplay, "The Scientist"

26. “You’re gonna keep my soul, it was yours to have long ago.” - State Radio, "Keepsake"

27. “Celebrate we will ‘cause life is short but sweet for certain.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Two Step"

28. “It’s always darkest before the dawn.” - Florence + The Machine, "Shake it Out"

29. “There are many things I’d like to say to you but I don’t know how.” - Oasis, "Wonderwall"

30. “You say you want a revolution, well you know we all wanna change the world.” - The Beatles, "Revolution"

31. “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.” Billy Currington, "People Are Crazy"

32. “Well my heart is gold, and my hands are cold.” - Halsey, "Gasoline"

33. “I don’t want to be heard, I want to be listened to.” - Twenty One Pilots, "Forest"

34. “Where you invest your love, you invest your life.” - Mumford and Sons, "Awake My Soul"

35. “I think I need a sunrise, I’m tired of the sunset.” - Augustana, "Boston"

36. “All of these lines across my face tell you the story of who I am.” - Brandi Carlile, "The Story"

37. ‘Ready or not, here I come. Where you at? The night is young.” - Bridgit Mendler, "Ready or Not"

38. “In the land of Gods and Monsters, I was an angel.” - Lana Del Rey, "Gods And Monsters"

39. “Turns out not where, but who you’re with that really matters.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Best Of What’s Around"

40. “Know yourself, know your worth.” - Drake, "0 to 100"

41. “I’m little but I’m coming for the crown.” - Lorde, "Still Sane"

42. “Didn’t they tell you I was a savage?” - Rihanna, "Needed Me"

43. “Hands in the air like we don’t care.” - Miley Cyrus, "We Can’t Stop"

44. “I’ma keep running because a winner don’t quit on themselves.” - Beyonce, "Freedom"

Cover Image Credit: https://pixabay.com

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In Memory of the Capital gazette five

A tribute to the legacy they left behind.


It's time to say it. Journalism is the most important yet increasingly dangerous occupation.

By now, many of you have heard about the tragic shooting at the Capital Gazette in Annapolis, Maryland. FIrst, may G-d protect and comfort the mourners. Second, why are journalists targets?

It's no secret that in many foreign countries today the media is the first thing governments and power-hungry individuals seek to control, suppress or eliminate upon their usurping of power. Many countries, like Somalia, Rwanda, Turkey and China, force all journalists to publish only state-approved propaganda. What's worse, they'll jail or kill journalists who stand by their convictions and insist on a free press.

I look at the person who gunned down the five Capital Gazette journalists, two of whom I recognized immediately, as less than this. I see him as nothing more than a spoiled coward. He didn't have the decency to let the court ruling in his failed defamation lawsuit stand. He couldn't put on his big boy pants and deal with his own personal demons. Instead, he took out his anger on people who were hired to do one thing: Write stories about people in their community. Which they did, ethically, efficaciously and timely.

It's been around 225 years since journalists have been targets on these shores to the increasing frequency in the first few decades of this century.

During that turbulent colonial period, dozens of brave souls, including the famous Thomas Payne, journalism was a truly dangerous profession. Those courageous men and women put their lives on the line to expose the abuses of the British monarchy and neighboring business owners who exploited fellow colonists. Like any other authoritarian regime, the British Crown then would go to extreme lengths, including hanging journalists for treason for publishing the truth as they saw it.

In this young century, journalists have to fend off not just a narcissistic president who compares them to a great evil. They also battle one another over the most trivial of political trivialities on a daily basis. Print journalists, in particular, have to carry over their heads the specter of a business a great number of experts say is gasping for monetary air.

This horrific attack on respected and honored defenders of print journalism, in addition, resurrects the age-old question of how free should the press be? Where is the dividing line between keeping journalists safe from harm and leaving our society open to scrutiny and debate? What topics, if any, are to be mandated as "off limits" to journalism?

As I reflect back on the articles written by the Captial Gazette team and many other journalists throughout this country, some of whom I have profound disagreements with for their political rhetoric, my answers are simple. Completely free. Eliminate the dividing line. And, none.

That may sound simple but it's not.

Despite the obvious downside of having a press free to investigate and report on literally anything, it is a necessity. The good outweighs the harm. The knowledge and support their information provides their community, our nation, and the world grants us the freedom to check and balance our government in ways not conceived two-and-a-quarter centuries ago.

On the other hand, as journalists, we must be ever conscious that our world has changed. That, like our foreign counterparts, we have domestic enemies who seek to stop us by every mean at their disposal. Including, may G-d save us, murder.

Carrying these ideas forward, we must also recognize that we must leave no stone unturned. Investigate the new Watergate. Espouse our insane political opinion. Use every fact to our selfish advantage. Or, just as bad, ignore every fact to our selfish advantage.

All of the above force our fellow journalists to keep us honest, ethical and efficacious. But above all, it brings honor to those who are unwittingly thrown into that literal line of fire. It forces us, the survivors and the living, to create a legacy built from their memory. In this way, we can move forward, resolute that we have done our real job: Preserving our history as we live it.

This article is dedicated in memory to the courageous Capital Gazette team who fell in the line of their duty of telling the story. May their work be a source of endless information and inspiration.

In memory of:

Robert Hiaasen

Wendi Winters

John McNamara

Rebecca Smith

Gerald Fischman

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